For all
couples who have difficulty conceiving, adoption is usually
one of the first options presented to them before they
begin any kind of fertility treatments, but for more and
couples, they are choosing to adopt a child whether or
not they could have children biologically. Maybe it’s
the wave of celebrities adopting children influencing
them, but for some couples, they decide that they’d
rather share their homes and hearts with children whose
birth parents either cannot, or do not wish to raise them.
While the process is certainly not an easy one, navigating
the red tape, not to mention emotional upheaval is well
worth it for those who decide to open their homes to
a child, even one from another country.
As with every journey, there is the all important first
step that will put you on the road to adoption. So where
do you start? What are the steps you need to take to
open your home and heart to a child that you decide
to raise as your own? How do you prepare yourself and
your family for this new addition?
Let’s start at the beginning.
You’ve decided to adopt. Now what to you do?
Of course, you have to make sure that if you are married,
that both you and your spouse are on the same page in
regards to this life long commitment. Make sure that
you both understand how your lives will change and if
you don’t already have children, how the presence
of a child and needs of that child will impact every
decision the two of you make until that child grows
into adulthood. You have to be sure that you are able
to provide this new child with all its material and
emotional needs.
Talk to your extended family about your decision to
take this step. Their support through the highs and
lows of the adoption process will be necessary to help
keep you on track.
If you decide to make this commitment, the question
then becomes if you want to adopt a child from your
country or another. For the purposes of this article
we’ll be mostly focusing on the process of adopting
a child in the United States.
You can start the ball rolling by visiting either
an adoption agency, a lawyer familiar with the adoption
procedures or a foster care agency. Be prepared for
the financial cost of the adoption process as it is
considerable. The least expensive option is through
foster care where the agency will financially assist
your care of the child. A private adoption agency can
run anywhere between 8-30,000 dollars.
As a couple, present your intention to adopt a child.
If the organization accepts your application, a home
study will be done to examine the stability of not only
your environment but of your marriage.
It is much easier for a married couple to adopt a child
than it is for a single person. This is because most
agencies believe that a two parent home will provide
the child with a more stable, well rounded environment
in which to flourish. This is why most organizations
will require you to be married for at least three years.
While the common age for prospective parents falls
with 18-40, there are some agencies that will consider
older couples if they are both in good health.
After the home study is completed, and the agency finds
you acceptable, they will begin the process of matching
you with a child. Once they find a child they think
would be a good fit, you will meet with the child’s
social worker, or in some cases of private adoption,
you’ll meet with the birth mother as well. You’ll
learn more about the child and you and your spouse can
both decide if this is the right child for you. You
can discuss with the social worker how you can best
meet the child’s needs.
If the social worker and/or birth mother approves of
you, you will begin visiting with the child. In the
beginning the social worker/and or the child’s
caregiver will be present during these visits but with
time you will be allowed to visit with the child, have
them visit you and spend time with them alone. A child
of seven or older will be allowed to file reports on
how they feel about your visits and about the idea of
being adopted by you and your spouse. If these visits
go well then the social worker will go ahead and allow
the child to be placed in your home and begin proceedings
to file the adoption order.
During the first six months of the child being placed
in your home, they are still the ward of the state and
the child’s assigned social worker will visit
at least three times to see how the child is adjusting
to life in your home and how you are adjusting to this
new member of your family. If the social worker sees
that the child is happy in your home and that you are
providing him with a loving, stable environment, at
the end of the six months they will go ahead an apply
to the courts for an Adoption Order and allow the adoption
arrangement to become an official permanent one where
guardianship will finally transfer to you.
The decision to adopt is not one that should be taken
lightly and the process will certainly not be easy,
but once you decide to open your home to a child that
isn’t of your body, you will find that you find
that you have opened your home to one that will become
a child of your heart.
For more information visit Child Adoption Laws at:
www.childadoptionlaws.com
|
