Some
thought of breastfeeding as primitive. Formula was touted
as being equal to or superior to breast milk. Only recently,
has the fact that “breast is best” been acknowledged.
Other women were in the workforce. They may have felt
that breastfeeding was not an option for them. They
did not have the modern breast pump available to them.
The medical community may not have encouraged breastfeeding
at the time. It is not hard to imagine. After
all, even with all the knowledge about the benefits of breastfeeding
there are still many health professionals today that are uneducated
and unsupportive of breastfeeding. With all the challenges
in the way of breastfeeding, it is understandable why many
women of yesterday did not choose to breastfeed.
Breastfeeding
has come a long way but still many of the old thinking still
carries on. Women are more educated on the subject;
however, even with the many books and other information available,
people are often most influenced by their immediate family
and friends. Having the support of friends and family
can boost the chances of having a successful breastfeeding
experience. On the other hand, having to deal with criticism
and misinformation from the people you are close to can sabotage
a new mom trying to breastfeed.
There
are many ways to deal with the negativity of others.
One of the best things you can do is to try to understand
why the person feels the way they do. Is it because
they were taught differently about breastfeeding? Were
they indoctrinated with the ideas that breastfeeding is primitive
or inferior? Or is it that they feel breasts are a sexual
object? Maybe they have never seen someone breastfeed
and it makes them uncomfortable. This is the case with
a lot of people. Once breastfeeding in public becomes
more commonplace, perhaps, this will become less of a problem.
Whatever the case, finding out the root of the person’s issues
with breastfeeding may help to resolve the tension.
Here
are some things you can do to deal with criticism.
Be
positive: It is hard for someone to argue with a
happy, positive person. If you are excited and enthusiastic
about breastfeeding it can be contagious
Try
to educate them: Find information on the benefits
of breastfeeding to mom and baby and share this with them.
You don’t have to “push this down their throat”. Just
be enthusiastic about your decision to breastfeed and share
with them why you decided to.
Be
sympathetic: A lot of times women are defensive
because breastfeeding did not work out for them. If
you sit and talk with any woman that really wanted to breastfeed,
you can hear the sadness in her story. Try to be sympathetic
and non-judgmental. Don’t say things like “you could
have or should have”. Share your experience, be positive,
and let them know you care.
Try
not to get angry: Breastfeeding conversations can
get very heated. Getting angry with someone is not likely
to change her feelings. It will just make you and her
upset. If you don’t feel like you can talk about breastfeeding
with this person change the subject or avoid talking about
it.
Use
your doctor as your advocate: Sometimes the best
thing you can do is tell someone that this is what your doctor
recommends. What you think means very little to some
people but a doctor’s word carries weight.
Don’t
be sarcastic or insulting: Belittling someone is
likely to make someone defensive. It is not a good approach
to winning someone over. You may turn an opportunity
to educate someone into a personal attack.
Stand
your ground: Do not let someone else decide how
you are going to parent. If they are uncomfortable then
they will have to come to terms with it. You do not
have to change the way you parent to suit someone else.
If
nothing is working then you may just let the person know that
you do not want to discuss the issue with them any more.
Hopefully, it doesn’t come to this.