What
to do
Pick
the right restaurant.
Choose a restaurant based on its level of child-friendliness.
What’s important? The availability of a children’s
menu that includes food your kids will actually eat.
The absence of a long wait for a table. Booster seats
or high chairs. Private booths or eating nooks as
opposed to one large open room. And a noisier, family-friendly
atmosphere.
Teach
restaurant manners at home.
If you are casual about mealtime manners at home,
don’t expect your children to miraculously develop
table manners because you happen to be sitting in
a restaurant. Practice good manners at home for every
meal, and your children will be prepared when you
eat out.
Have
longer sit-down meals at home.
Typically, at home we call our children to the table
when all the food is ready, and then excuse them as
soon as they are finished eating. If you want to practice
for restaurant visits it’s a good idea to have
them come to the table a few minutes earlier. Then
sit and chat for a bit after you are finished with
the meal. Make it fun by telling stories or jokes
or talking about upcoming plans. Not only will this
be great practice for eating out, it’s a wonderful
ritual to introduce into your home.
Dine
out at your regular meal time.
When possible, stick close to your routine. Plan to
dine at a reasonable time, before the kids become
famished and tired. If you must go out later than
your usual time, then provide your children with a
snack at the normal time, and allow them to have a
smaller meal at the restaurant, or to eat half the
meal and bring the rest home.
Review
your restaurant rules before you go.
Be very specific and leave no stone unturned. A sample
list of “restaurant rules” might be: Sit
in your seat. Use a quiet inside voice. Use your silverware,
not your fingers. Have nice conversation, no bickering.
If you don’t like something, keep your comments
to yourself and fill up on something else. If you
have to use the restroom, ask me privately and I’ll
take you.
Ask
for an immediate appetizer.
Many restaurants automatically bring bread or chips
to the table as soon as you are seated. If this isn’t
the case, ask for something to be brought out for
the kids.
Prevent
boredom.
Bring along a few simple toys, like a deck of cards,
plastic animals, or small quiet toys that can keep
the kids occupied while they wait.
Mother-speak:
“We ask for to-go boxes and the check at
the same time we order our food. This way, if
we have to leave because of a tired or whiny child,
we can make a fast get away.”
Reagan, mother to Hailey, age 2 |
What
not to do
Don’t
imagine that eating out with kids is the same as dining
without them.
When you take children to a restaurant the focus is
not the cuisine or the atmosphere. It’s all
about controlling the excitement and boredom, teaching
your children formal manners, and having quality family
time.
Don’t
stay too long after eating.
Keep your post-meal conversation short. The longer
you stay, the more likely your children will run out
of patience and act up.
Don’t
make them eat what they don’t like.
Stick with familiar foods when possible. If the grilled
cheese sandwich your child ordered turns out to be
Swiss cheese on sourdough allow your child to eat
the French fries and pack up the sandwich. A restaurant
is not the place to battle over new and unfamiliar
foods.
Don’t
stay if you’re not having fun.
If a child’s behavior gets out of hand, take
her to the restroom or out to the car for a time out
so that she can calm down. If she continues to misbehave,
don’t be afraid to ask for doggie bags and leave
the restaurant. But don’t give up. Review your
expectations and try again
Excerpted
with permission by McGraw-Hill Publishing from The
No-Cry Discipline Solution
(McGraw-Hill 2007) by Elizabeth Pantley http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth
