The 4th of July holiday weekend is upon us, and you know what that means: my family will be generously stimulating the economy by dropping inordinate amounts of money at local fairs and fests. Nothing feels more patriotic than dropping $200 on unlimited ride bracelets! God Bless America!
Of course, we’ll be honoring our forefathers by partaking in some of our country’s traditional cuisine, like funnel cakes and corn dogs. My kids will again embrace the American principals of greed and excess at a variety of holiday parades, and they will stage a re-enactment of the suffering of the original settlers and their oppressive rule by the British when they are denied the ability to exercise their inalienable human rights to play “just one more” insufferable carnival game. They will then bemoan the fact that we do not have a pool, thereby limiting their ability to stage their own Tea Party. I’m thinking that, as an alternative, I’ll toss them some poster board and markers so they can make their own crappy, misspelled protest signs like today’s modern revolutionaries. Easy summer craft!
Although my husband and I will grumble mightily about the unrest among our subjects, and threaten to take away even more of their freedoms, in the end history will repeat itself and we’ll find ourselves the victims of democracy. Five vs. two wins every time.
I have to excuse myself now. It’s time to go paint the town red, white, and blue!
Tags: fourth of july
