At least once a week, I read a couple of fantasy blogs where mothers sort their kids’ Legos by color and re-pour the extra paint in their garages into smaller cans decorated with hand-made, personally designed labels, and I swear - SWEAR- that I’m going to pull myself together and get my life more organized.
I studied the “daily schedule” templates and “cleaning schedule” lists of other perfect bloggers and decided that all my life needed was a bit of a regimen. All I needed was a spiral notebook and a dose of good, old-fashioned can-do spirit. All I needed was was a will and “the way” would surely follow.
Well, you know what I really need? To live alone. THAT, my friends, is the only way my life will ever have order, routine, and structure.
Yesterday it was blustery, but I was determined to get Kellan and Larissa outside for a while. On my to-do list, I had the idea to border a small area outside my back door with stones from the woods behind our house. Kellan and Riss love digging in the dirt, so we got bundled up and I had them sold on my idea. Seconds later, I was traveling back and forth between the woods and whatever area of the yard the two of them were currently bickering in. Their interest in helping me was NIL. They were far more preoccupied by arguing over a deflated volleyball and negotiating like a couple of teamsters over two IDENTICAL swings. What should have been an enjoyable half hour project took over one hour, as in addition to refereeing their disputes, I had to stop them from systematically emptying the garage refrigerator. Even though we’d just eaten lunch, those kids were “staaaarving.” The second I took my eyes off of them, they had opened 6 juice boxes, torn the tops off three yogurts, dragged out a bag of popsicles, and devoured a sleeve of cookies.
Two quiches in the time it took to explain the complicated love triangle that resulted in a crime of passion.
Paleo chili in the time it took to unravel the mystery of a tragic death at the edge of a cliff.