May 9th, 2013 by

I hate this day

April 30th, the last day Cora was alive.  As much as I have come to terms with some things, it’s still hard.  I STILL have the “if only I’d done this,” and “I should have done that,” thoughts that pop into my head, forever haunting me.

In the end, no matter what, she’s not here.  She’s not here.  And that hurts more than anything I could ever express.

I’m supposed to be planning a birthday party.  Instead I’ll make cupcakes and release butterflies.  As much as I love that tradition, it’s just not the same.

*sigh*

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