Geri

About our blogger: Geri

Geri married her husband, Tony, in August 2007. About a year after, they started trying to have a baby. After some infertility testing, they found out that Tony has a genetic condition that would make having children difficult. Even if they did try IVF, the genetic condition resides on the Y chromosome and would be passed down to any male offspring.

Deciding that it was much more important to become parents than to become pregnant, Geri and Tony decided to make an adoption plan. They are anxiously awaiting a match for a domestic infant so they can begin building their family!

Visit Geri @ http://buildingafamily.net/

Posts by Geri:

August 29th, 2014

Here we go again……

We have kept busy in the last year and a half!  In March 2013, Faith came into our lives.  In July  2013, she became “officially” ours.  We celebrated her first Halloween, her first Christmas & New Years, first Easter, and finally, her first Birthday!  Then, in May 2014, we sold our first home where we celebrated all of those firsts and moved to a larger home in a new town.  (A bittersweet stepping stone.)  We said goodbye to our sweet cat, Murphy.  We left Faith’s first daycare which we loved and started in-home daycare with a nanny whom Faith absolutely adores.

We are totally in love with Faith.  She has brought so much joy to our lives.  She is the funniest, sassiest, cutest, and stubbornest, little person I know.  Faith entering our lives has tested our marriage, brought us closer, tested our patience, and brought out characteristics in both Tony and I that we never knew existed.  Through all of the challenges, ups, downs, twists, and turns, hearing that little voice say, “Mommy” and “Daddy” will light up a dark day and give you that extra boost of energy when you don’t think you have any more.

We are excited to announce that we are starting the adoption process all over again!  Read the rest of this entry »

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May 31st, 2013

Home

I remember an essay question from a test in High School English.  “Can you ever really go home?”  For the life of me, I cannot remember the book that this essay question related to, but the question has always stuck in my head for all of these years.

The first week of Faith’s life was spent in a hotel room.  The next three weeks, were spent at my parent’s house.  In the words of Meranda Lambert, it was “The House That Built Me.”

I am forever grateful for my parents for welcoming us warmly without knowing when we would leave.  Just as precious as those first days when we got to spend time with Faith’s birthmother in the hospital, were those first weeks that I spent raising my daughter in the room I hadn’t spent any time in since I was a teenager.  Rocking my baby to sleep in the room that I spent my high school years was a little surreal.  I still have random pictures stuck up around the room, my shelves are still semi-filled with memorabilia.  My curio cabinet filled with mementos of all of my years dancing still stands against one wall.  It all waits for me to come and claim it one day… but that’s what we really have parents for isn’t it?  Storage?  ;)

It didn’t take long for me to realize that when you are home, old habits die hard.  I remember where the creaks were in the floor walking from my bedroom to the bathroom, dodging them was a skill I had honed well growing up.  However, my dad has redone most of the floor, so those creaks aren’t there… that didn’t stop me from trying to dodge them.  With the floors recently redone, I almost tripped down the first step downstairs almost daily.  You see, there used to be a ridge that you could feel with your foot.  You’d feel it and know that a couple inches further was the first step down.  Not feeling that ridge, the first step comes really fast!

Then there was the bathroom.  And this may sound really weird, but I noticed that I would face a certain way when I was in the bathroom.  It was totally inconvenient to doing anything.  But I had always done it and never thought twice.  Well, as I was thinking about it I remembered why I had always done it since I was little. Read the rest of this entry »

May 13th, 2013

The Moment

Ya know, you get into this thing.  This parent thing.  You have this new little thing to take care of.  You don’t know what to expect.  They don’t know what to expect.

Not only does she completely trust you to care of her every need.  Her birth-mom trusted you to care for her child.  To love her unconditionally.

I never thought this would be hard for me.  I always thought this would be easy.  Mothering seemed like it was instinctual to me since I was a little girl imagining 7 children (Cabbage Patches at the time, Sandy, Bethany, Katie, Shane, Headah, Lara & Brenda if you must know…).  It didn’t come that easy for me.

From the moment of Faith’s birth when we were in the air flying from Minneapolis to Tampa and we heard that her birth mom decided to see her (not the plan), we knew things were going to be ok… but different.  Then when we got there and got to spend an incredible night into early morning and full day with Faith’s birth-mom, I couldn’t let my guard down.   I couldn’t fully attach to her knowing that she was not “mine” yet.

Unbeknownst to her, A* gave me (us) some of the most precious days of our daughter’s life.  She gave us tips and insight.  She assured us from the first moment we saw Faith and her, “She’s yours”.  But I could tell in her eyes that it was killing her on the inside.  And it was SO hard for me knowing that I was taking something from her.  It was like we were kids again and I was stealing a toy.  Before TPR was to happen, I went to speak with her for the last time and I came back and collapsed into Tony’s arms.  I felt like I was the one causing her pain.  And that killed me. Read the rest of this entry »

March 15th, 2013

Meet Faith Ashlynn

If you’ve ever wondered, you can pack two adults and stuff for a baby in about 1.5 hours, book a flight and jump on a plane.

Last Sunday, March 3, at about  3:30pm we got a call that A* may be going into labor.  We called the airline and found out that the last flight out of Madison was at 5:15.  We dropped everything (Tony was pulling out carpet, we were getting all packed up to start our last remodeling project before baby) and started packing.  Just in case.  We still didn’t have confirmation, so we started driving to the airport.  Just in case.  We got to the airport and still didn’t have a firm, yes, they are going to do the c-section tonight, we decided we were hopping on a plane now or possibly missing the birth of our baby.  Just before we boarded our second flight to Tampa, we heard they were going to do the c-section.  That was reason enough for Tony to buy the in-flight wi-fi.  On our 3 hour flight to Tampa, we got the first pictures of our baby girl.  She was born 3-3-13 at 7:59pm; 6 lbs 3 oz; 18 1/4 inches.

Since the plan was that A wasn’t going to see the baby, K, our social worker was at the hospital to take her after she was born.  We got a text that A changed her mind and wanted to see the baby.  That worried us at first, but I didn’t Read the rest of this entry »

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March 1st, 2013

My Crazy Life

I’m not going to lie.  I think the wait after the match is worse than the initial wait.  Now we have an end time.  But it could change.  But maybe it won’t.  I’ve mentioned before, I’m a planner.  This is really hard for me.  It’s made me a complete nut.

I’ve washed clothes, sterilized nipples and nuks, washed bottles, booked all travel, and now her bag is officially packed.  Since the due date has changed three times so far (March 22, March 18, March 15…) and seems to keep moving sooner and sooner, I want to be as prepared as I can be to pick up and go.  All we are hearing is that birth mom is going to go into labor early.

The mix of being excited, anxious, and nervous has proven exhausting.  I have learned quickly that being anxious and taking a trip to Babies R Us is not a good idea… I came home with things I never anticipated needing, but in the moment, I could justify each and every I was throwing in the cart.  (Confession: I didn’t have a cart, I was the crazy lady with  three large items in my arms turning down the cart when it was offered to me while dropping the fourth thing I was trying to look at on the floor)

As if it wasn’t enough to have a match and bring a baby home, I decided that I would LOVE to have a distraction.  Choreographing “Fiddler on The Roof” would be great!  Of course I would do it!  HA!  Luckily, I work with a bunch of WONDERFUL cast members and production staff and when I had to step down after choreographing a little less than the opening number, they understood.

Baby and choreography was enough, right?  Nope, my crazy husband and I want to finish the house.  So, the POD just got delivered.  The dumpster comes tomorrow and we’re ripping out our living room and extra bedroom starting next week.  Because  it’s totally logical.

It may be crazy, but when I take a look at our lives right now, it’s a pretty cool crazy.

February 4th, 2013

It’s A…… BABY!

Ok.  We’ve been keeping it quiet for what seems like forever.  And people are starting to ask questions about why we’re taking crazy day trips to Florida…

It all started 2 weeks ago with an email.  A birthmother in Florida.  I know, I know, we’ve said over and over after “almost” matches that we would not even look at possible matches in Florida again.  Well, we decided to tempt fate one last time.  In a matter of hours, our profile was sent to her, we were on the phone with the lawyers in Florida and the next thing we knew, we were matched!

We didn’t have a lot of details, we only knew that she loved our profile and wanted to meet us.  So we began the second part of our journey and booked flights for a quick weekend trip.  We just got back.  Life as we know it has changed.

We flew out early Saturday morning and got to Florida a little after noon.  We enjoyed a lunch outside in the sun, (It was negative crazy temperatures and snowing when we left Chicago…) and headed back to our hotel to relax for a little bit.  HA!  Relax!  More like quietly-freak-out-and-try-to-control-our-excitement-and-fear.  Then we hopped in the rental car to meet A* and the social worker, K*.

We got to the restaurant Read the rest of this entry »

December 8th, 2012

Tis’ The Season!

To be completely honest, the last thing I thought I would be doing for the holidays this year was praying to get through them.  After last year’s struggle, I thought for sure that it was the last year that Tony and I would spend the holidays as just the two of us.   I thought we would have a little family this year.

Secretly throughout the year, I planned the family photo for the Christmas card and the “Baby’s First Christmas” ornament, stocking and outfit.

But, here we are, three weeks away from Christmas, and I’m sad to report that we have no news.

We’ve had a year filled with ups and downs.  We’ve cried over the what-ifs, almost’s and one situation we thought was a sure thing.  We have come to learn that in the world of adoption, there really are not almost’s and there are certainly no sure things.  It is filled with what-ifs and unknowns that Tony and I never thought we would have to face 10 years ago when we met, or 5 years ago when we got married.  No one plans for infertility.

We have gutted and remodeled what used to be a spare bedroom in our home.  It is now a nursery complete with furniture and themed bedding.  We’ve stocked up on baby books, diapers, and our car seat is ready to go!  This year has brought a lot of preparation for baby.

But, right now, the crib is a slightly large cat bed that Murphy loves spending time in and the diapers are tucked away in a drawer so I don’t have to see them every time I walk through the room.

In a season where we remind ourselves what we are thankful for and count our blessings, it has been easier for me to think of what I don’t have.  But when I stop and correct my thoughts, I think of all we have been blessed with and I get overwhelmed with emotion.

We want to thank our family and friends.  Without your prayers, thoughts, and love, we would not be where we are today.  We love you all so much, thank you!  We wish all of you and your families a happy and healthy holiday season!

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October 13th, 2012

Peaks and Valleys

I want to start by saying thank you to all who follow our blog.  When I first started it over a year and a half ago, I thought it would be so easy to keep up and share all of our news.  The emotional journey to adoption has proven extremely hard.  The choices of what to share when and with whom have been harder.  Despite that, I hope people will continue to share my posts to spread the word about adoption.  I hope to help other adoptive parents understand that there are others out there in the same situation as you… you are not alone.

We have had a lot happen in the past few years.  I find myself receiving information about possible situations and not even reacting.  It’s almost a post-trauma-like response.  I have put a high guard up in regards to what I let into my innermost feelings.  The “feeling something” doesn’t set in until we’re a few days into a situation.  One has to understand that there are days when we receive information about possible situations via email, and to get excited for an instant when you see who it’s from only to open it and find out that it’s nothing even remotely close to something that would work for your family, whether it’s financial or otherwise, can get exhausting.  But to be completely honest… you do see a glimmer of hope Read the rest of this entry »

September 1st, 2012

Maybe?

I got a text.  I met her.  It all seemed to be falling into place.  I heard about a possible birthmother.  She was a friend of a friend.  We met for coffee because she had some questions about adoption.  My intent going into the meeting was to give her the information for our agency and answer any questions she may have.  I was mentally prepared to be a sounding board and that was it.  When she started asking questions about me and Tony, it got real.  She wanted to know about us, our relationship and why we wanted to adopt.  She said, “I really like you.  I hope my mom likes you too.”

I left the meeting on top of the world.  I thought we finally had something!  She liked me and wanted to meet Tony.  I agreed to meet with her and her mother as soon as they wanted to, I would make my schedule work.

Then… we waited.  A week later I contacted her to see if there was a good time and she told me that they wanted to meet with an agency before meeting with us.  We haven’t heard anything since.  We don’t know if she went to our agency or if she decided to go with another agency that they had talked about.

To say the least, I was devastated.  Of course, I know Read the rest of this entry »

July 24th, 2012

If you build it….

After 3 weeks of construction and one year (at least) of shopping to pick out the “perfect _______” (Insert anything baby here… cloth diapers, detergent, theme, color)…  The nursery is done!

There is not much going on with the actual adoption.  We’ve had at least one more situation come and go since my last post.  I wish I could keep the blog up, but between work, family, events and emotions, blog posts just haven’t happened.

From the beginning of construction, to tonight when I applied the vinyl quote to the wall that reads, “Promise me you’ll always remember, you’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think. -Christopher Robin to Pooh” (don’t know if that was an affirmation for myself or for my baby…), washed the sheets and blanket for the first time, it has been an incredible time of nesting for me.  My husband thinks I’m nuts.  At times even I’ve thought I was crazy.  But seeing everything come together Read the rest of this entry »

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