I know, I know.  It seems to be all I post about lately, but this is important y’all.  It’s important to me and it could help someone else who is struggling.

As I mentioned in my previous post, I weaned Daniel at 8 months.  I was going through a phase, which I now call my “touched out” phase.  I was so done with being touched.  I was angry, overwhelmed, resentful and just plain tired of constantly being needed, kneaded, bitten, having my hair pulled, my face pinched, you name it.  What I didn’t know then that my feelings were valid and that most importantly, that they would pass and I would enjoy my nursling again.  I’ve seen this same thing over and over again from other moms who have chosen to wean their babies earlier than their goal or earlier than one year and I want to tell them — no shout it out loud — “stick with it”  ”just give it a day or two more”  ”it’s a phase and it will pass”. I want to tell them that I’ve been there and I then lived with the regret, remorse, shame and self-anger for having weaned before my son was ready, before even I was ready.  Let’s talk about it.  Don’t sit alone and think your only option is to wean.  It will pass.  It will get easier again and you will be thankful that you’ve persevered and so will your babe.

I’ve done some reading and it seems to me that this phase usually happens a few times, around 6-8 months (when some moms typically see the return of their normal cycle, and the 6 month growth spurt), and around 14-16 months.  We’re at 18 months now with Keelan and I’ve had to kick my own butt twice now to keep on keeping on.  I don’t tell you that to make myself out to be a hero or a martyr or anything like that.  I tell you because I want you to know that I know.  That I have been there and I’m here to support you.

I hear it all the time.  One of the benefits of breastfeeding is that it’s easier than formula.  Definitely some aspects of breastfeeding are easier, but as a whole, the process is not easier.  Sure you don’t have to wash bottles, or cart around powder and water while you’re out and about with your little one.  Sure, you just whip out a boob in the middle of the night as opposed to getting up to mix up or heat up a bottle.  Breast milk is always the right temp and readily available.  And certainly the benefits your child gets from breastfeeding are reward enough, but if one more person tells me how easy their breastfeeding journey was, I think I’m going to scream.

I’ve been a formula feeding mom.  Sarah and James both thrived on formula and though I do regret not having the knowledge that I do now, then, I don’t kick myself over it.  I mean, come on.  It was 1988 and 1991.  There was no internet to get the support I now have.

My breastfeeding journey with Daniel and Keelan were anything but easy and problem free.  My first problems started minutes after Daniel was born and I didn’t know how to get him latch.  Add to that that he was born on a Saturday and there was no lactation consultant on duty (staffed Monday to Friday) and by the time one finally visited my room on Monday shortly before I was being discharged, I had already caved and given him formula.  When my milk came in I did purchase a pump and he was bottled fed breast milk.  I kept offering him the breast and at 3 or 4 weeks I was finally able to get him to latch and we were able to ditch the formula.  However, when he was 8 months old I was going through a touched out phase.  I didn’t know it was a phase at the time and that it would pass if I persevered, so I weaned him and he continued on formula till one.  Daniel has eczema and a peanut allergy and I have to wonder if I didn’t contribute to that with the formula he consumed.  Again, although I regret my decision, I don’t kick myself over it.

When you know better, you do better.  I knew better with Keelan and I was determined to (more…)

Have you seen the Time Magazine cover for this week?

It surely has sparked a lot of controversy on the interwebs.  But this is OK: (more…)

This week, for Mommy Mondays, I want to discuss some tips for learning the tricky up-hill slope that is breastfeeding. No man understands all the feelings attached to this word. Before you have your first baby, you can almost write a book about the horror stories you have heard about breastfeeding - crazy things, like bleeding nipples, pink or green breast milk, babies that lose weight from not getting enough, moms that say it is the hardest thing they have ever done in their life…. There really is a lot of hype about breastfeeding. Not to mention all the breastfeeding guilt-trippers. “You know, if you aren’t successful at breastfeeding, your child will get sick about 15 extra times each year. Do you REALLY want to be responsible for that?” or “If you don’t breastfeed your child, then their IQ will be 10 points lower- how’d you like THAT for you kid?”

Honestly. It’s just like that.

So, here is a less-complicated viewpoint. Breastfeeding is great for you and your baby if it is done right. Some women can’t or won’t breastfeed, but that doesn’t make them bad moms. If you want to be a successful breast feeder, it can be tough or confusing. If you really want to breastfeed that little darling of yours, you will need some help. Here are some tips to help you make that happen.

Read up on successful stories. You will hear some CRAZY things if you talk to other women about breastfeeding. Crazy. So, make sure you know the facts and that you hear some success stories.

Arm yourself with a buddy. Find a woman (mom, grandma, bff, aunt, cousin, whoever) that you are comfortable talking openly with and that has breastfed successfully. Let them know that you will be coming to them with questions- they can be a great resource. It can really be one to the best things that you can do to help you succeed. Don’t know anyone you feel comfortable with? Join a mommy website and post in their forums. (more…)