First of all, I love almost everything about being a stay at home mom. I love that I get to watch my boys grow and learn daily. I love that, when it’s nice, I can get things done quickly and then spend the day outside, usually at the playground. There are just so many positive aspects that I adore and wouldn’t change for anything in the world.
However, I have one huge problem. I HATE HATE HATE not making any money! I feel so guilty for buying anything that isn’t a necessity and try to avoid it, but I really stink at that. What am I buying, you ask? I get bored with cooking or just don’t feel like doing it, so I want to run out and take the boys somewhere quick or just different. I want a good coffee or soda or to take them out for ice cream, but because I am not making the money, I feel so guilty. (Yes, I still do it, because I have no willpower.) For instance, I went to pick up Troy from preschool and wanted to take him and Will out for lunch because for most of the year, my mom or a close family friend would pick him up and take him out to eat before bringing him home. The problem: I had no cash. I didn’t want to use a credit card, but I didn’t want to dip into the cash stash we have, because it wasn’t a good reason. It was driving me nuts! I was like, “I JUST NEED $15!!!!!!”
Now, before anyone beats me up about admitting this, I know I work my tail off as a stay at home mom. I cook, clean, do laundry, run errands, take care of the lawn (somewhat), and most importantly take care of our boys. I know that I deserve the little extras here and there, but I can’t justify spending the money easily when I am not making it. AAUUGGHHHH!