As parents we all have our own concepts of the right way to do things. Some of us may fall in line with the strict disciplinarian parenting style and others may be relaxed and carefree. Most of us, however, are a little bit of both or maybe somewhere in the middle. The bottom line is there are no rules to parenting and one size does not fit all.
If you ask two children, both raised by the same parents, how they feel about their parents, you will likely get two different answers. Children interpret things differently. While one child might feel, for example, that she was disciplined appropriately, the other might feel she was treated unfairly or abused. As adults, many of our decisions are based on our own upbringing and experiences. This can be good or bad. Some may repeat their own parents’ parenting style and some may choose the complete opposite.
Things to consider when making parenting choices:
How will my choices affect my children’s future happiness, outlook on life, behavior and relationships?
Parents generally want the best for their kids; even the ones that don’t make the best choices. Of course, no parent is perfect but some may make better choices than others. Evaluate your discipline strategies, daily routines, and how you communicate with your children. If what you are doing or saying is not the way you want to be parenting, it may be time to refocus and change your parenting approach.
How much time have I spent reading or educating myself on my parenting style?
This is not to say that everything written in books is concrete or right. As stated earlier, there are no rules to parenting and one size does not fit all. However, there is a lot of value in learning from others. Parents have long followed others advice on everything from potty training to dealing with lying. Consider reading books from parenting authors or talking with other moms that parent similarly.
Do you like the way you parent?
This may be the best way to know if you have picked the right parenting style for you. Do you feel good about your family life and your choices? You will never find two parents that agree on everything when it comes to parenting. Choose what is right for you and your family. When you hear how someone else chooses to parent, before criticizing, try to remember when it comes to parenting one size does not fit all.