Waiting for this to feel real
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May 23rd, 2008, 12:56 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Hi all. I'm 7 weeks pregnant today, but I don't feel it. I had a miscarriage 4 years ago at 11 weeks. I think I'm scared to be too attached to this little one, as I don't want to go through what I did last time (I had to have surgery, as they thought the pregnancy was ectopic, although it turned out to be a normal pregnancy that was miscarrying, so I had completely unnecessary surgery and a long recovery time).
I'm hoping that once I hit 11 weeks, it might start to feel more real. I just feel like a bad mom already, because I can't be as excited as I'd like too. Can anyone relate?[/b]
I didnt' buy anything until 20 or 21 weeks...I didn't rub my belly..ever......I was very desensitized to this baby-really distant in order to protect myself for the worst case scenario. And then I, too, felt guilty that i wasn't as 'in tune' with this baby as my other three.
Don't feel guilty about the way you feel...you are sooo not alone! I still, even now, have a hard time...all the 'what if's' drive me crazy...
But I have just started to focus more on being grateful for every day that he is growing and staying there and that helps me. I don't have any guarantees, either and I wish I did, but we just don't.
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