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November 17th, 2008, 09:06 AM
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plan4fate plan4fate is online now
I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
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Today I should be holding another child in my arms. She should be here by now for me to fawn over and love. But she's not. And although I miss her, I'm not as sad as I am over the boys loss. I don't think it's because they were lost first, because in general I get upset about losing her more.

Maybe this is a sign that I am healing from my losses? That I've finally accepted that things happen for a reason.

My mom, my ex, myself, a friend and my grandmother have all had dreams this week that I call them in December and tell them I am pregnant. It's not outside the realm of possibility for once, yet I'm afraid if it's right I will lose yet another baby. So I'm going to cross my fingers that AF shows in December.

So if everyone could please look to the sky and say hello to my little angel I would appreciate it. I figure she would have little brown curls and dark brown eyes, you'd know her if you saw her, she probably looks just like me .
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Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells Polypectomy - August 21st
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Trying a few cycles of clomid and progesterone. FX this is all it takes.
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