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November 17th, 2009, 09:05 AM
just e just e is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 7
Aerisa,

My heart goes out to you. We should email back and forth if you would like. I'm on the opposite side of your life experience literally (was sent to catholic school where i very much had belief and faith in G-d until my mothers parents died and she lost it and my life went into a whirlwind) and have made peace with the fact that I am just not a Christian and can't take my children to "church" to teach them about G-d knowing that I don't believe in any way shape or form that Jesus was anything more than a man.

Having been on both sides of life (as child and parent) the greatest lesson I have learned is to be very happy for the successes of my children and my life. I thought by now I would be teaching and I'm working part time in pharmacy. I had expectations in my life of how my children would be and has some learning disabilities the other is a huge tom girl (possibly gay?) and I've just had to say to myself, you know, I'm ok with this! This isn't what I imagined, but it is my life and I'm happy to be in it. This is what my life is meant to be because its the only way that it can be.

I think that if you're thinking about how you feel about going to temple, you are thinking that it's something you want to do, otherwise why would you think of it? Give it a try. I have my issues with attending synagogue as well, so I'm certainly not one to preach about going when I myself don't do it as often as I should, but it's a good place to learn and to reconnect with community and that's good.

I take a view that my religion is between myself and my G-d, I make no apoligies for who I am religiously and don't feel the need to defend the way I go about things. Because of my daughters learning issues, I decided last year that I am not going to send them to Hebrew sunday school. I can't afford it at this time anyway, but I have to make sure my children have an education that will give them the opportunity to live a life on their own. I teach them what I can about Judaism, a Hebrew word her and there, but there wont be full on Hebrew education, and I am ok with that. I'm really going on and on. Feel free to send me a message on here if you would like.

Incidentally my family is from Lutheranville, Midwest and so I completely relate to your feeling like an outsider. Shalom everyone!
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