Thanks!
I just wanted to clarify things here (I've already had somebody asking if they can use this list, so I'm not changing some things because it suits us but I want people to know why
)
don't need immediately-
baby gates -
we're getting these right away because we have big, scary stairs and don't want to be caught without one... my income can be up and down, and the last thing I need is a mobile baby and no cash for a baby gate 
toys/books/rattles-can wait at least 2 months or so, I might get a couple of books for reading to baby, but not for them to read/play with yet -
we're doing books because DH is a big fan of Robert Munsch, and wants to read to baby while in utero and afterwards - toys and rattles we'll probably end up getting in the shower anyway, but we might pick up just one or two for the cuteness factor LOL.
teething relief -
kinda like the baby gate... the last thing I want is to have a screaming, teething child and NO cash for relief! LOL
do need immediately-
swing
(already have one, thats why its on the buy later list - only buy another one if baby hates this one)
bouncy seat
(only buying if baby hates the swing we have and/or the one we buy later...)
questionable-
I would NOT get formula for just in case if you are really wanting to exclusively breastfeed, it can be way too easy in the middle of the night when you are exhausted to just say "just go ahead and give him a bottle 'just this once'" -
very good point, and I don't want to ever have that happen so NOPE on the formula!
rain cover/bunting-sounds like that's done, but I wouldn't spend money on that -
it came with the carseat, luckily. probably wouldn't have spent cash on it either, if it hadn't... i doubt I would ever use it anyway.
extra base -
don't have a 2nd car, so no real need.
infant headrest-you should just use the one that comes with the carseat, you don't need to buy another one typically -
have it already, it came with the carseat too we might need a little something for the stroller for the first bit (since it is NOT a travel system, I hate those things...) but we'll just be using receiving blankets rolled up or something if we have to use anything at all.
add to list
changing pad and cover for changing table (if using one) -
not using either, I'm short and those are all so tall - they scare me LOL
need large quantities of
onesies -
yep!
burp rags -
yep!
receiving blankets -
totally!
multiples of rash ointment, mylicon, tylenol and lanolin for diaper bag -
good point on the multiples!
Thanks so much for all your input, you must have spent a lot of time on that I'll definitely NOT be getting formula, and stocking up on doubles of the rash ointments and stuff for the diaper bag for sure!!