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I shut the naysayers up by pointing out how in most areas of the world, the family bed is so normal that putting a baby to sleep alone is considered abuse, and the incidence of SIDS in those countries is lower than here. If necessary, I also let the naysayers know that I've got friends who've lost babies who were sleeping alone, but not a single friend of mine has lost a baby while co-sleeping.
What about rolling onto them? We are aware of the edge of the bed and where our partners are. We are aware of where our babies are. (This is barring taking medications and whatnot, and having sleep disorders.)
Anyone who wants to claim that co-sleeping is deadly needs to start talking about formula, which results in more deaths. And many times more children die in car accidents every year, even properly-restrained children. If co-sleeping is so horrible because babies have died, then children should be banned from cars, where they are much more likely to die.
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