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speedyone January 27th, 2009 12:57 PM

January 27, 2009

I am writing this as a way to keep track of everything as I am slightly forgetful. I wasn't trying to get pregnant, but I believe I did manage to get pregnant. I have the normal signs of a pregnancy, plus I have been pregnant before when I was 20. I had a miscarriage with my first. I may have been pregnant a second time, but I was not sure since I had a really really bad period with that one as well. Now I am almost positive I am about 3 weeks pregnant.

I have not tested yet, but my gut instincts tell me I am. With my first (loosely known as "Hornell" for where was concieved, though that would not have been his name if he'd have been born. I don't know what it was as I miscarried 2 months into the pregnancy. I always felt it was a boy.) I had major cramps, cravings, but no morning sickness. This one, I have fit into everything with. I've started to gain a little weight, which is odd to me because I can't gain weight to save my life. things are tender that normally aren't. I have minor cramps sometimes in the morning followed by nausea.

I hope I can carry this one. I feel that I'm not going to lose it, but what I feel and what happens are two different things. The father, I am no longer with him, but he is excited over it. He is the one who suspected I was pregnant because of all the things I was complaining about. Right now, he is not my worries. I just don't want to lose this baby because it was so hard for me the first time. I love children, and while I wasn't planning on having any until much later, maybe this is a way of saying its better to do it now than then. My main fear right now is losing this baby. It deserves a chance at life like the rest of us got. I know it doesn't make much sense, but I miss the baby I didn't have.

Jaylas_Mommy January 31st, 2009 05:27 PM

i am sorry for your loss! when do you think you will be testing?
best of luck. i am sending some sticky dust :dust: :dust: :dust:
KUP on the main board!

ms.crystal January 31st, 2009 07:04 PM

Awww.... trust me, I know how you feel. I lost my first one last july and It was very difficult for me. now that i'm pregnant this time, i'm trying to do everything right. I miss the baby I lost too. Good luck to you

Snowpeas February 1st, 2009 08:39 PM

Congratulations on your pregnancy

I had a chemical in July and I still grieve for my lost child. I think part of me always will.

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