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-   -   "im better because im a working mother!!" (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f1831-2009-playroom/1602505-im-better-because-im-working-mother.html)

Genevieve's_mommy June 17th, 2009 06:31 PM

"im better because im a working mother!!"
 
Now i do NOT agree with that at all I dont think ANY one is better because they are SAHMs WAHMs or WAFHMs or whatever!!! But i am curious.. how many of you are SAHMs future SAHMs WAHMs or future WAHMs or going back to work.


this girl i work with said something today that really bugged me since the night before we talked about me quitting and being a SAHM/WAHM. well today she said that she "hates lazy people" because she's going to be a "full time student-working mother of two!" and she "hates when people say that they CANT work." First of all i never said i CANT work.
im sorry that i dont want a BABYSITTER raising my children (no offense to anyone!!!) and i think that if DH and I can do it without me working and not living of the Government (again NO OFFENSE) then we are good!

so poll!!! ARE YOU A SAHM, FUTURE SAHM, WAHM, FUTURE WAHM, OR GOING BACK TO WORK?

BellaBellski June 17th, 2009 06:43 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
LOL - SAHMs are lazy ..... Riiiiiiiight!!! *shakes head* I love the fact that I can be a SAHM, I wouldn't change it for the world! I'm incredibly lucky to get to spend every day with my daughter, instead of sending her off to a daycare. *I* want to be the person that raises my kids. Not someone else. I know not everyone gets the opportunity and I don't have anything against working mommies at all, but let's not forget that SAHMs work, too. (Well, most of us :lol:)

mommy2boys0809 June 17th, 2009 06:55 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
ask her if she has ever been a stay at home mom to a toddler... i don't think you have a chance to be lazy..

Genevieve's_mommy June 17th, 2009 07:00 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
LOL it just cracks me up because when she said that i would to my self "im lazy? really cos i think taking care of a baby/toddler is more work than going to school and being a working mother." i AM going back to school, but i dont want to work while i do it. LOL

mommy2boys0809 June 17th, 2009 07:07 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
I tell DH that somedays it would be so much better to go back to work... but I don't want to leave my DS with a babysitter. I can't wait to go back to school. Waiting till this one is older since i plan on EBF and i don't do well pumping.

Mads-Mum2EG&L June 17th, 2009 07:09 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
I'm going back to work but not for at least 6 months +

When I do go back to work I'll be working whenever Alice isnt so that Elle will always have one of her Mummies with her. Of course there could be the occasionally babysitter, but not often.

Snowpeas June 17th, 2009 07:10 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
Proud SAHM here. And I find it much more challenging than any nursing job I had before! lol

To each their own situation. I'm very thankful I can stay home right now - especially while my children are young. I was working part-time for about 6 months after Olivia was born and there were things I liked about it but it was still hard to be away from her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by midnightdreams86 (Post 16260778)
ask her if she has ever been a stay at home mom to a toddler... i don't think you have a chance to be lazy..

:ditto: LOL. Now I know why they're born all cute and cuddly and helpless as newborns. If they were born as toddlers there would be a lot less pregnancies. :lol: Whew, Olivia wears me out - in a good way - but sooo exhausting mentally & physically


eta: I have the utmost respect for WAHM's and SAHM's. Like has been brought out - neither is easy & they each have their pros and cons. I think everyone needs to make the decision that works best for their situation and family.

mamatolots June 17th, 2009 07:52 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
Wow. She sure knows it all, doesn't she. I know plenty of moms who are lazy who are sahm. But I also know plenty of moms who work because they can't or don't want to handle staying at home. I don't think one is any worse than the other.

I have been a sahm for 18 years and will be for another 5-6. When all of my kids start school THEN I will be ABLE to get a job. I am one of those who falls into the category of "can't work". Why? Tell me who has a job that will pay for daycare for at least 8 kids? (2 are old enough not to need it) It would COST me money to go out and get a job. I have done other things like babysit, etc. that I can do at home but I CAN'T afford to go out and get a job. Especially with my husband being gone so much. He's not here to pick up the slack.

I am a sahm of soon to be 10 kids, I fly solo probably 75% of the time, I work d*mn hard at it, and I am d*mn proud of it. :)

And hats off to women who work and and are moms. Sometimes I can't imagine how I could possibly do it. :)

Kierasmom June 17th, 2009 08:07 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
Sahm

MrsSteele June 17th, 2009 08:10 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
I WISH I could be a SAHM...but unfortunately, we can't afford it with DH in college...so I will be going back to work after 3 months...BUT my mother is unemployed and my grandmother (63 and still very with it and mobile plus retired) will be with her when we are both working, so she will most def. be with family....

MrsSarah1 June 17th, 2009 08:11 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
Before this pregnancy, I worked and took care of my daughter. Now, I am at home temporarily and taking care of my daughter, so I have done both.

I think that they are both difficult and easy in their own way, and no one should feel superior in their parenting ability because they do either of them.

Being a stay at home mom is hard because you really never get a break. My only "break" is when DD goes to bed at 8 pm, and usually I'm so beat tired that I go right to bed when she does. I never get a lunch break, there is always something to do (laundry, cleaning, cooking) and also the emotional stress of having little adult conversation. It's hard. Sometimes I feel like I'm on the outside looking in.

Being a working mom is hard because you work work work all day long in a stressful office and the second you get home you want to put your feet up and watch tv. Wait.. your baby needs a clean diaper, a bath, a meal, play time, cuddle time. What about those nights that they don't go to sleep until 3 am? You STILL have to go to work the next day. No nap time for you! And to top it all off, most likely you'll miss many of their firsts. Their first steps, their first words, their first day at the zoo. You have two days off of work, so you try to squeeze in housework, chores and spending time with your kids. By the time Monday morning rolls around, you look at going back to work as a break!

Both situations are hard. Even work at home moms have a hard time, try squeezing in a full work day with kids running around that need attention and food and care!

Just being A mom is hard. No matter how you go about doing it, it's hard.

I hate it when people think that they are superior or inferior because of the kind of mom they are. We need to stop!!!! We are all moms, and it's hard. We need to support each other. We need to be there for each other.

Genevieve's_mommy June 17th, 2009 08:15 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
i have the respect for the working mother and the SAHM.
i just dont think being a working mother is for me, ya know. but it really ticked me off that she was saying she was better than i am.

~Paula~ June 17th, 2009 08:38 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
I've done both... I can say that a working mom (for me) was harder... however... I atleast had adult interaction. Being home, with a toddler ALL day, ALONE (during school)is tough! Not to mention, so so so so rewarding!!
I worked in a daycare and I was that person raising working parents children, teaching them colors, numbers, shapes, potty training, etc.... I loved those kids! But I went home dead tired...
So, I think that whatever you have to do for your life/family/situation... is exactly the right thing to do!
My Mom worked, she didn't have a choice and I appreciate her doing that so much. She was dead tired but she did it for us, I don't feel jipped or neglected or forgotten because she worked.
I do not have to work. DH makes enough that we can afford for me to stay home and be the Mommy I have always wanted to be.
But to call SAHM's lazy.... LMAO. She can walk in my shoes anyday and see how lazy I am. 2 kids, 4 cats, 1 puppy, and me pregnant... I welcome her to the challenge! lol
D@mn, now I have to go find my cleaning fairy.. because apparently she got away again. :(

CautiousMommy June 17th, 2009 08:40 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
I stopped working when I had my son because I do not want a stranger raising my child. Let me tell you something I worked in a daycare and most of those parents whether they were working or no dropped those kids off from morning to night because they do not want to raise thier kids and could not handle them. It is my preference to stay at home with my children until they are school aged. I am going to a 4 yr college as well, but am taking all my classes online.

fishysticks June 17th, 2009 08:42 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
SAHM and I love it! If ANYONE ever had to audacity to call me lazy i'd kick them in the throat- the last thing a SAHM is, is LAZY! I am busier at home then I EVER was at work!

disturbedangel121 June 17th, 2009 08:46 PM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
Since my son has been born I've been a SAHM but we really can't afford to have 2 kids and me at home so I will be going back to work.. I'm going to hate having to spend so much time away from my babies but I gotta do what I gotta do.

mommy2Breana+Brandon June 18th, 2009 05:02 AM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
I am going back to work after baby is born I don't want to but Financially in this economy I have to.

No one is better than the other. Each have their own decisions!!

ms.crystal June 18th, 2009 05:29 AM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
wow. I WISH i could be a SAHM! I'm going back to work, cause I NEED too. But if I could stay at home I would!

SusieQ2 June 18th, 2009 05:36 AM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
It always makes me laugh when people judge SAHMs like that. Some people think it's so easy. While I love it more than anything and would hate to give it up it can be mentally and physically exhausting.

Most jobs give you a break during your day. I don't get one of those. Even when DS is napping that's usually my chance to get the house cleaned up a bit or do one of the chores that's hard to do with him under my feet. My only adult interaction throughout most of the day is here. I get on here to save my sanity!

*Crystal* June 18th, 2009 06:04 AM

Re: "im better because im a working mother!!"
 
We couldn't afford for me to be a SAHM. I will be going back to work but I am teaching part time the first year of the babies life... possibly the second if the economy doesn't pick up and the school system doesn't get the money that it needs to make me full time. It will be good for me and the baby for me to be part-time at least the first year. Frankly I need to work. I love my job. I need adult interaction and I will need a break every once in a while. I think that I am in the perfect situation though as a part-teacher. I will only work 2 or 3 days a week and I will have those 2 1/2 months off during the summer


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