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June 24th, 2006, 11:33 AM
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beck12 beck12 is offline
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 12,330
I also don't want to deal with other people's opinions.
I think do many have acted like I shouldn't keep trying - and it makes it hard - especially with work - because each time I mc - I need time off. It bothers me greatly that I would let that get to me - but I don't have the best job security out there. In my state - we have "at will" employment laws - which mean that you can be fired at any time for ANY or NO reason. So he couldn't say he was firing me because I had another mc - but he could come up with something stupid like he doesn't like the way I organize things...or simply say nothing & say he's letting me go. And I truly believe that could be a possibility.

I also hate that friends & family act like they know ANYTHING about it - even when I KNOW I have told them things that should have educated them - they seem to forget it all completely...like maybe I need more testing. More testing doesn't "fix" anything. And there are always a MILLION questions about whatI have done or not done as if there is aperson on this planet more motivated than me at trying to figure this out.

I am fraid that one of days something is going to go so wrong & they'll end up telling me I need an emergency hysterectomy or something....I'm not sure how realistic that fear is, being as I have never had any complications, not even a D&C - but I have it anyway.

What if I got pg, had a healthy pg, and then spent the rest of my life as an overbearing, hyper paranoid, annoying parent that feared everything? What if I wouldn't leave my child with my own mother, or I wake up 10 times a night to check their breathing, or I never let them do anything, all because I have some fear of it never being completely okay? And I know I have to get through a pg before that is even possible - but still - what if I'm one of those crazy moms & my child grew up to hate me for being so hovering? How would that be a happy ending?

.....and of course - al the fears already listed - and I am sure a million more if I let myself think of it a little longer.
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B - Crazy momma to my two boys
We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet




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