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September 9th, 2010, 05:52 PM
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MzzMommaD MzzMommaD is offline
Sleepy Rat Rattery
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Phoenix AZ
Posts: 1,063
Linzie, take a deep breath. We all go through times where we have one thing or another going on that makes us hate ourselves. My example? I was too caught up in my depression over what happened with my ex. I let my son go and my boyfriend. He had to support us entirely on his extra loans from school. I was too depressed and lazy to get anything done. It took me a whole year. I now have a job and work 40 hours a week. And even then, i get OCD and start picking up every tiny little thing on the ground. Find out if there is other support around there you can access. Have you heard of Babysitters, Nannies, Child Care & Senior Home Care - Care.com ? you can find someone on there who can help with the kids for very little money. Just explain to them your situation. There are many people who are willing to help. We sank so low recently that I had to turn to craigslist for help, I posted about needing diapers for my son as we had two choices, diapers and wipes, or a roof over our heads. We got 200 diapers and 100 wipes. From people we had never met before. One lady even gave us an extra 20 bucks to make the drive to her and back for the diapers. I cried my eyes out for two days when I realized what I had done, to myself, my son, my family. My depression had eaten me up and I was not doing anything to better our lives.

DH has the same problem, he yells as DS sometimes when he is frustrated about something and DS cant communicate back. Not bad, just frustrated. But then he feels terrible inside and cant even be around us because he feels so bad. Its ok. It happens to the best of us. Talk to your DH and see if maybe you can pick up more work. Try Mystery Shopping Company & Customer Service Experience | BestMark sign up under DS since I know he is old enough. Ref# AZ3731
You can work as much as you want when you want and get paid every two weeks. Its owned by my extended family, so its all very trustworthy. We made 900 in 2 weeks and paid all our bills. You can also mark it as extra earned income and get child care from your state.

But most importantly, remember to breath and remember that you are a great mother. You are raising three kids. Its not easy to be a mom. Especially with a tiny one. Just do the best you can with what you have. We are all here to listen and help you. Remember that.
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