Ferber and CIO doesn't work for us either because we BOTH end up in tears
I definetly agree with trial and error. I tried tons of ways of getting Caleb to sleep and what works for us is me playing music and sing to him while rocking him. That way he's out in the time it takes 2 songs to play! Hopefully after a few times of you standing over Milan while he puts himself to sleep he'll be more and more comfortable falling asleep on his own!