Your ideal midwife
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April 28th, 2011, 09:01 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2010
Do you prefer a midwife who is super hands off, doing little to no testing and practically letting you UC while she knits?
During my pregnancy, I prefer a midwife who will be supportive of whatever I feel comfortable with. Someone that has a good sense of the client's preferences. In my particular case, I liked my midwife pretty hands off during my pregnancy with my second daughter. This time, I am using the same group of midwives and I have been happy that they have been supportive of the extra testing that I've wanted to do because of my miscarriages and the fact that I am 8 years older now.
During labor, I prefer the midwife to be hands off and check me only occasionally. I can't stand anyone counting while I'm pushing, etc.
Do you prefer a midwife who is more pro-medicine, maybe a little more proactive and quicker to transfer - maybe a CNM? (Or a birth center)
I prefer a midwife that is well educated, well experienced, and keeps up with the latest research. I want to trust that she will know what signs to look for and will be proactive if there is a concern, but not over-reactive. I guess a happy medium. By the way, I don't necessarily consider CNM's more "pro-medicine." In nursing graduate school you are certainly not trained in the medical model, but in the nursing (holistic) model. Also, I used the same group of midwives (who happen to be LMs) that are doing my home birth at a birth center last time, and their care is the same in the birth center as at a home birth.
Do you want someone motherly, or someone professional or in between?
I definitely don't want motherly, but do want friendly. I want to be treated as a colleague who plays an important role in the pregnancy and birth with all decision making processes. When my midwives come to the house for a visit, I want them to feel at home, and I've made sure that they know where the bathroom, fridge, garbage, etc., are, so that they will feel comfortable when it comes time for the birth. We spend a lot of time just chatting at visits. They are also very professional and up to date on the latest research.
How long are your appointments? Do you like them or wish they were longer or shorter?
I guess the actual professional part of the appointment may be about 20 minutes, but then we also spend extra time chatting.
Have you found your ideal midwife or are you still looking? Is what you want even available in your area?
Yes, I've found the ideal group. They were easy to find because they are the same group of midwives that delivered my daughter at a birth center almost 8 years ago, and I've run into them here and there through various functions and mutual friends over the years. I feel very comfortable with them and know I'm lucky.
Mom of 3 awesome girls
Lucia Jane, born 10.9.11
Forever missing our angel babies
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