Being new with blended families..
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July 27th, 2011, 12:52 PM
Join Date: Sep 2005
Welcome to a blended (or as I like to call it not-so-blended) family.
Everything you are experiencing is very common in these situations. In our situation, bio mom is nicey, nicey almost sicky sweet to my face & then bashes me to the kids behind my back. It all started when dh's youngest who was 6 at the time, told her mother that she wanted me to take my dd to daycare & then she & I were going to Hawaii in my van. Oh boy, bio mom was massively threatened!
The next visit dsd & dd were playing barbies. dsd barbie was the mom & named Kris (me) and dd's barbie was the child & named Lucy (dd). dsd makes her doll say "Lucy I have a meeting and I'm much too busy for you" Yup you guessed it bio mom was a sahm & I'm a professional working woman. So now she's telling her kids that I'm not a good mother! I almost hit the roof. Of course, not to dsd because she was just repeating but I did intervine & say the truth "I'm never to busy for Lucy or you"
Bio mom also led dh's oldest who was 11 when they split to believe that dh was supporting my dd & me & not paying child support. That was completely wrong! The 1st year they were divorced, Dh gave her 70% of his income. Yup you read that right. He wasn't even fully supporting himself. I was supporting me, dd & paying the mortgage on the house that was mine before dh & I met.
I'm sure there is way more that I don't know about but it has led to Dh's oldest reaking havoc in our lives (long story) and in the end me banishing her from my home. Dh barely has a relationship with her (she's now 16) and dd, ds & I have none.
(((hugs))) I hope your situation doesn't reach that point. I strongly suggest some family counseling. I really wish I had known to do that in the beginning. I think it would have help us tremendously.
My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
Last edited by My2miracles; July 27th, 2011 at
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