That time of year.
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December 3rd, 2011, 12:57 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
I don't have legal custody, Im afraid to take him to court for fear of courts granting him rights. He hasn't seen my child since a week after she turned 1, and she turns 8 on Monday. In my eyes, he shouldn't have any rights to her if he has never tried to talk to her, support her, and tried to kidnap her when she was 1 (the last time he saw her). He took ****** care of her when he did see her. So in my eyes, he has no right to see her. I think it would be detrimental to her to suddenly say "Hey heres your Dad" and let him see her.
I will never lie to her about her father, but only, and ONLY when she asks. She has not asked yet. I have never changed my number, so he can get a hold of me but hasn't. When her great grandfather passed away they listed her in the obituary.... but no one contacted me. Oh, but her name was spelled wrong. Her father has always had a way to connect with me but never has. I have always kept my email open and phone has been the same number sine we were together, but he has never called or emailed. So, ya know, if he wanted to be there he would.
I also don't influence her opinion because we never bring him up. Ever. She has never asked about her father, and we haven't brought him up. That is something we decided we would approach when she brings it up herself, and she hasnt yet. The only time she started to say something was when she realized she had a different last name than me, but we were in the process of changing it legally. But she never outright asked "Who is my Dad/Why do we have different names." So I have never lied, and will never lie. That is a promise I have made, it's just a topic I haven't said to her yet, ya know?
Oh and we do have everything documented. He hasn't called in years, or contacted me in any way in years, as I said. He hasn't supported her in even longer. The most support he has ever given in her entire life was 50 bucks. Everything he has done, we have documented. We have her attempted kidnapping documented. We have EVERYTHING documented. We haven't changed my cell number just in case he does try to contact me.
I hate what position he has put me in, because I wish he had no rights. He shouldn't have rights, because he hasn't been in Lily's life. Tony has been in her life since before Matt left, and he will be the one adopting Lily when we marry. But until we marry, Matt technically has rights even though he has been absent for 7 years. Which I find to be complete BS. I don't want my daughters life turned upside down because Matt finds it convenient to pop back into her life as he deems fit, ya know?
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