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June 27th, 2012, 11:46 PM
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plan4fate plan4fate is offline
I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
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Witch showed last night.. and left all her attitude with me. Poor DH. It was just bad news after bad news for me yesterday, I've about had enough of it to be honest.

I'm not sure what I want to do this cycle. It would be a very inconvenient cycle, as we are leaving for Canada on July 30th. I would have barely enough time to confirm a pregnancy with a beta and wouldn't get back until we were nearly 8 weeks. The likelyhood of a doctor giving me something for nausea for our 48hr car trip would be slim... and then I'd have to lie to my family while we were there. I don't feel comfortable telling them before 8-9weeks.

So.. do I want to abstain. Do I want to just shut up and try and realize that I can do everything in the world to get pregnant, if it's not meant to be it won't happen.... do I bang my head off the wall until I feel better? I don't bloody well know.

What I do know, Is I cried a lot last night. That I had horrible dreams. That I'm short tempered and feeling completely devastated. I'm feeling hopeless, and negative about everything.

I may be scarce.. i feel like I need a step back for a bit. I've never actually had a JM break in the 4 years I've been a member... maybe it's time.....
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Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells Polypectomy - August 21st
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Trying a few cycles of clomid and progesterone. FX this is all it takes.
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