Wish I could feel happy... but I don't
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August 19th, 2012, 09:17 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2010
I have spent the past week and a half worrying about every cramp, back ache, ect.... I know it's out of my hands and I should enjoy today but it's so hard.
I wake up and think is this normal, is that the same back ache I got before my m/c? Ugh! It's driving me crazy, literally!!!
I had a m/c at 11 weeks last April. In June I got pregnant again, or so a test said I was. On July 19th in the middle of the night a fully loaded log truck crashed out front of my home spilling over 100,000 lbs of logs through my house completely destroying it. My 5 yo son was killed, I lost my pregnancy as I was crushed under the logs and have 5 pelvic fractures, 2 in my lower spine and my hip was separated from my pelvis.
The physical recovery has been coming along, but apparently the emotional piece isn't because I feel emotionally overwhelmed. I keep thinking can I handle another loss? And then I feel sad that Liam is gone, am I trying to replace him?? So now I have the guilt
I am sure pregnancy hormones aren't helping but I feel like I am going crazy and just needed to vent this somewhere
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