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September 4th, 2012, 05:49 AM
Learning to walk in faith
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Near the land of cream cheese
No and no over here too. My ex hasn't spoken to me (aside from the occasional rude emails I would get in the 6 months following our break up) since the day I left.
When I first started dating dh, I wouldn't say I was *jealous* but I did go through an initial phase of intimidation at the history. I had lived with my ex and we were together for several years, but we were never married and never had any children. We vaguely talked about it in a kind of "Maybe way down the road..." way, but that's about it. I had no reference point for what it must feel like to have shared those things with someone.
That feeling passed as time went on, though, and I became more secure in our relationship. Dh was always incredibly patient, loving and supportive while I worked through those things, and that helped a lot. It was also helpful to hear dh talk about the hows and the whys of some of the decisions he made years ago. It gave me a more accurate picture of his experiences, and flushed away a lot of the things my imagination had come up with.
Dh used to be a lot more accommodating to bm's whims too, and that would sometimes frustrate me (especially since I knew the kind of thing that was being said behind his back, and knew that she was taking advantage of the fact that he's a good person), but now that the crazy has escalated and he's able to see it all for what it is/see the consequences of it, we've reigned the bending-over-backward waaaay back in.
As it is, contrary to her belief that all of our decision making is centered around her/how we can best 'abuse', control or manipulate her, we're both looking forward to the day when we no longer have to interact with her at all.
Thank you to Jaidynsmum for our awesome banner and my fabulous siggie!
Last edited by Keakie; September 4th, 2012 at
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