Pregnant at same as DD?
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October 2nd, 2012, 07:36 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
I'm done having kids, so when my kids are having theirs I can spoil them and be in "grandma" mode.
I have two siblings at 17 and 13 (14 next month) and my daughter is 13. Not only were we pregnant at the same time, she was just further along, but I was planning my wedding, and an Aunt thought it would be great to throw my mom a baby shower and then doubled it up as baby shower for mom/bridal shower for me. I was pissed.
None of my friends were invited, none of my family showed up, except my mom, grandmother, and the nut job aunt that hosted it.
I felt like my mom's pregnancy over shadowed my wedding, and the spot light was on her instead of me. So, bad subject for me.
A month or so later found out that I was pregnant and when we announced it, we got more comments about how mom and I were pregnant together than I did "Congratulations on your first baby". etc.
My sister, who's 5 months older than my daughter, is spoiled, snotty, and she's had self image issues she tries to push on my daughter. (like women's breasts are disgusting, can't play with my daughter if she's just wearing shorts and a short shirt because she's "naked", and then told my daughter the details of how babies are made when they were VERY young. (my sister has some medical difficulties that caused her to mature as early as 6 and they had to have the talk with her, because the doctors were putting her on meds to STOP her from going through puberty at age 6/7).
My mom was so focused on raising her last 2 kids, since us first 3 were all teenagers when they were born, that until the last year or two, she wasn't really in "grandma" mode. We've had issues where she wanted to harshly punish OUR children when she wouldn't punish her own at all for the same kind of behaviors.
She has also homeschooled both my younger brother and sister, and we feel she's done the kids a real disservice. She didn't put enough effort into activities or learning environments for the kids, so my 17 yr old brother who should be a senior is just now doing 6 grade work, and he can't work out basic math. My sister is dyslexic, struggled to learn to read, should be in 7/8th grade and is doing 4th grade work.
So yea. Sensitive issue for me, and I'm sure other mom's who have babies at the same time as their daughter are not like my mom, so please don't take my opinions/feelings on it to mean I don't think ANYONE should have that experience. My experiences with it just sucked royally.
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