Ever feel like your family is not complete but you can't afford to add to it?
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February 8th, 2013, 05:44 AM
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Western Chicago Suburbs
I think FW said it well. It's so hard to have you and DH not be on quite the same page as far as family size--at least yours is open to more; that's positive! Maybe when your baby is a little older he will come around, but I agree that in pretty much everything when it comes to kids that it's usually better to submit to the more conservative position--you could always have more later, but you can't put one back and if hubby feels like it's mistake it will put strain on your marriage, which would be much harder on children than a tight budget.
I'm pregnant with #4 right now, and we have just accepted that our kids won't necessarily have all the treats and gagets and expensive activities that their smaller-family peers might have, but we feel like what we do have is more precious and we have enough to support ourselves. Yes, we have to budget and go without some things, but we're doing well. And, honestly, with breastfeeding, cloth diapers and home or public school, the additional children (beyond 2) aren't adding THAT much of a financial burden outside of trying to save for college, but our priorities, financially, are paying our bills, saving for OUR retirement, and then, if there's extra, college savings. They might have to work and get scholarships and put themselves through college but that's ok, I did it.
Our biggest concerns about expanding our family are how hard pregnancy is on my body--it generally puts me out of commission for a minium of 2 months in the beginning and one at the end. We have concerns about whether or not our family would be able to cope with that when our children are in school and have real commitments, so this is probably our last biological child, but I'm open to adoption later, and we never decide no for sure until a minimum of 1 year after the most recent birth. Your baby is only 5 months old and your hubby hasn't said no; if you're faithful, pray on it with an open heart and I'm sure you guys will talk about this again and eventually come to a decision you both feel good about.
Mom to four beautiful girls
Matilda (6), Evelyn (5), Adelaide (3), Cecily (20 months)
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