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April 29th, 2013, 10:41 AM
Amaranth Dhanya's Avatar
Amaranth Dhanya Amaranth Dhanya is offline
aka Hillarie
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: In the West
Posts: 11,187
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My mom stuck it out til I graduated high school and even tho my sisters were younger she waited til I was that old. Not for me but because by then we were all older and could hopefully understand why she left dad.

She was miserable most of her marriage and we all knew it. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife by the time she finally left. It was a relief for all of us.

I thought about leaving Dan when he'd really be having bad days and was so mean to me and the kids. I thought about what would be best and, in my situation, staying was better because it wasnt his fault...it wasnt him acting rotten. If he hadnt have been sick none of it would have happened. I had to look at what leaving would do to the kids and I realized that denying them that last couple months with their father would do a whole lot more damage than hanging in here and me reminding them that it was the illness not him,etc.

I knew a lady who stuck it out til her kids were grown and gone before leaving her abusive and drunk husband. She was crazy! She regretted staying and her relationship with her kids suffered and she blamed sticking it out.

So Ive seen many sides of this type of thing. Really boils down to what you think is best for your kids in the long run. If Dan had been like that w/o being sick, I would have left no ifs, ands, nor buts about it.
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