Rules, boundaries, and discipline?
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May 17th, 2013, 08:18 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
I want my girls to be well disciplined and know boundaries and respect rules, etc., but my two year old is struggling with this. I've let her be a free spirited flower child for as long as she's been out of my womb.
But sometimes, just sometimes, I wonder if I've just been to lax. Like for example, the word "no." Example, she does something that annoys her aunt and then continues to do it even though she was told "no, I don't want to. I don't like it. Stop." You get the idea.....This normally results in me telling her she can't do that, you're making her (sad, angry, upset) and taking her away and putting her in another spot so she can play with other toys or read or do something with her time, and at most she'll sit on the couch say if she hits someone then she definitely has to sit on the couch. That's the extent of her being disciplined for her actions.
So then my sister, a different aunt, that works with children tells me that it's because I've not taught her boundaries/rules/discipline. And though it sounds like just plain criticism she actually likes that I attachment parent and she helps me with it since we live in the same house and she's very good with my dds. But I've also noticed that DD is a lot more disciplined with her. I also want DD to be able to relate to other children her age, especially later on. A lot of kids learn acceptable social behavior through school but she'll be homeschooled so I need to teach her those social rules, boundaries, and discipline. I want to put her in a dance class but don't want her to struggle socially---like being singled out because she doesn't listen to instructions, or doesn't know how to sit and listen very well, etc. And I know she's only two but I don't want her to keep having these same issues as she grows older.
So my question is: Is it really because I've let her do whatever she wants when she wants (within reason)? And how do I teach her these rules and boundaries? And I want her to be well disciplined, but does this means I need to start making her a schedule of sorts? She has her own schedule and I enjoy her being my little free spirited flower child that does what she wants but I also want her to thrive. I feel so lost today. What do I do? Better yet, what do you do?
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