How did you handle your older children when the baby comes?
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July 16th, 2013, 01:25 PM
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Western Chicago Suburbs
My oldest was 15 months when my 2nd was born and, probably just her personality, but we didn't have jealousy issues with her. When I nursed baby she wanted to be close so I would turn on a show for her to watch and she would sit or stand right next to me, often with her little hand on my knee until I was done. I also gave her jobs to do to help with baby (which I did when #3 came along, too) mostly stuff like fetching a cloth or diaper, easy stuff that she could see how it helped right away.
DD1 was 3 and DD2 was 2 when DD3 was born. DD2 was a little jealous but nothing terrible. I did make sure that she had jobs to do to help out and encouraged her to touch and talk to the baby a lot. I also made a point of sometimes actually saying "I'm sorry baby, you have to wait, I'm helping DD1 or DD2 now." Instead of always only telling them to wait. It seemed to help.
Finally, before each baby was born I made an effort to encourage the kids to spend more time playing independently, even just 15-30 minutes for a child who is used to being next to you all the time can really help. And I made sure their room or play room had plenty (but not too many!) of age-appropriate, interesting toys that would be easy to take out and easy to put away (we use bins)
And it's important to remember their schedule, too, when they're that little. It's easy to forget to make morning snack or get 30-60 minutes behind on nap or meals and hungry preschoolers and toddlers are angry uncooperative preschoolers and toddlers.
It will be an adjustment for everyone, but right around that 3 month mark you'll feel like you've got it all well in hand.
Mom to four beautiful girls
Matilda (6), Evelyn (4), Adelaide (2), Cecily (1)
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