Ugh---confession/vent...I don't know what to call it!
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September 12th, 2013, 12:24 PM
Mom to Alexandra Jane
Join Date: May 2011
The past couple of weeks work has been NUTS for me and I don't seem to get a break. I'm tired, I'm cranky, I need a vacation, I need a full night's sleep, I need a few minutes to relax and rest after work without making dinner, packing stuff for the next day, chasing around my munchkin, etc. In short, I am feeling frazzled. This morning my husband said to me that some days my attitude is really crappy caring for the munchkin if it's in the middle of the night. He said that I'm not mean to her, per se, but the stuff I say complaining about it just isn't nice and she'll pick up on it (for example: words to the effect that I'm freaking tired and we both---she and I----need to go to sleep), or complaining that she's up again to eat, etc. I admit it, YES, I have been doing that and I don't even realize it. I also think I'm a little less patient with her getting ready some mornings because I really need to get out the door. Instead of doing our normal playing on the floor to get ready routine, there's been a few mornings were it isn't all love and kisses and it's me picking her up, getting her ready, in the car seat and out we go. Days like that I feel I haven't been as gentle and silly with her as usual and I guess I'm more rough (it's not physical, just like no playing around, getting down to business).
I am feeling horrible mother's guilt! My husband told me about 50 times he wasn't saying I am mean to her or a bad mom or I don't love her, he was just saying while now I might be able to get away with saying certain things in time she'll realize what I'm saying and take it to heart that it's directed to her...which makes me feel even worse!
Has anyone ever felt that short fuse/feeling burned out like you need to take a chill pill and what have you done? This is all I've thought about this morning.
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