Upset and Confused
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September 18th, 2013, 02:34 PM
Join Date: Sep 2013
I just found out I'm pregnant with #2. I have a lot of emotions right now but I primarily feel really upset and depressed about the situation. I have a 15 month old that is still breastfed and he still gets a great amount of comfort from it. I know that pregnancy can put a wrench in that. I'm worried about attention being taken away from my son because he's still so young. I just can't imagine having another baby right now when my son is still very much a baby to me.
My husband and I do want a second child, but we weren't ready emotionally to have one yet. We're both in a good place financially and we have a happy marriage but my health suffered a great deal after my son was born. I was finally getting back into a good place in the last few months health-wise, and I'm worried that I'll go back to feeling awful again.
My son was planned so it's a completely different experience for me to feel like this. I was so excited for my son and feel terribly guilty not feeling any excitement for this pregnancy yet. While I understand abortion, I don't feel it's right for me because I feel that it would be even more difficult for me emotionally.
My husband has a mixture of feelings as well, but seems more excited than anything. He's mostly upset because things finally started calming down around the house and we had a lot more time relaxing and just enjoying each other. We haven't been able to do that since our son was born, and as soon as #2 is born it will be even harder to have that relaxed atmosphere.
Sorry for the book. I'm not really sure who I can talk to about this. I tried talking to my mom, but she was just excited about me being pregnant because everyone assumed we were going to have 2 close together anyway. This baby would most certainly be our last and my husband is already planning on a vasectomy after the birth.
Are these feelings normal? Will they ease with time? I know my son will be okay without being breastfed, and I know that eventually he will love his little brother or sister but it terrifies me that he will feel less loved. As a result I'm also worried I'll shower my son with love and neglect the second baby. So many worries!
I'm not sure how to feel better about this. I've been crying since I found out for the past 4 days, I just feel so down and alone.
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