Topic: Support
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  #4  
October 2nd, 2013, 10:14 AM
shen7 shen7 is offline
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 6,057
Awww, hugs!! It sounds like whoever you were dealing with had their own issues going on. Some people just want to externalize their bad feelings by pushing them onto others, creating drama, etc. One of the major cognitive errors is Emotional Reasoning, which often goes something like, "I'm talking to Lost, and now I'm mad [maybe because she is making me realize that I'm causing my own problems], therefore I am mad at Lost, she must be doing something really terrible to me!" Basically completely backwards logic. But often the ego will bend over backwards to find someone else to blame or play the victim. This is something that difficult people do.

Have you ever seen a book called The Feeling Good Handbook? It is a big book but I learned a lot of these concepts from it. It has whole sections on the most common cognitive errors (black-and-white thinking, labelling, etc) and also a whole chapter on dealing with difficult people. It is really designed to be a self help book for people with anxiety/depression but as an aspie you might find it really helpful since it can help you identify the emotionally driven illogical behavior that many people have, especially at their worst.
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