Relationship with baby's Father
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October 28th, 2013, 10:11 PM
Join Date: Oct 2013
Thank you all for the advice. It is nice to talk to someone who is a third party and hasn't been tainted by being a part of the situation. I really appreciate it!
I am starting to not worry so much now. I have talked to my boss at work and he said he would love if I came back to work early. I just have to get the okay with my doctor. I don't know if my doctor will laugh at me or not for even asking, but at least the option might be there. I made really good money when I was working so it would be great to get that income back!
That is what my Dad said. Age is no excuse, you either want to be there and help out or you don't. But it is nice to hear it from someone else too. He also said that when he was 23 and my Mom was pregnant with my Brother, he was scared to death. But he stuck it out and tried to learn as much as possible to ease his nerves. My Dad thinks he needs tough love and he may come around. I don't know about that anymore.
This was not a planned pregnancy. However, at first my fiancee was excited and told everyone as soon as he found out. Then he talked to some people at work and decided he didn't want to be a father and wanted me to terminate my pregnancy. Ever since then he has shut down. I think it is because he is so close to his ex girlfriends dad and her dad told him he is too young to be a father. I wish he wouldn't have said anything.
I have tried to communicate every which way I know how. I am sure I can try harder though to try a different way. I have tried having sympathy for him, talking in a calm environment, not telling our parents what was said, not nagging or pressuring him, etc. But it all seems to go in one ear and out the other. All he can focus on is that I am trying to tell him what to do. I think that may be why he pushes so hard to go against anything I want or think. Also, our parents have only just stepped in the last month or so because they saw that nothing was being done and were sick of me breaking down crying. That's when they stepped and starting giving advice left and right. They mean well but it is very possible that they are over stepping a boundary.
I really hope he turns his attitude around and starts to try to enjoy this experience with me. Unplanned or not, scared or not, this is supposed to be a happy experience. Even a learning experience. I also hope he stops insulting my family's heritage and the way I look. It just pushes us apart. But at this point, I think I should be preparing myself to be single Mom. I never wanted that to happen and it will make things so much harder, but I will do anything for my baby to make sure she has what she needs.
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