I am lost! (long / not baby related) :(
View Single Post
January 4th, 2014, 02:54 AM
Join Date: Apr 2011
I know i havent written here for a long long time, but now i feel i really need some advice. I have searched google for similar situations for some advice, but havent found any so i was considering asking some forum myself. I dont know any good forums and here i feel more "home" with you ladies.
Anyway. When i was 16 i started dating the father of my son.. moved together when we were 18. Our relationship then was perfect and i was cheering about it, because i thought we were the most honest couple ever seen! So.. when i was pregnant it turned out he had been lying about his depts, about where his money is going and his "gamble" in online games. That was his first lie that came out and i almost cried my eyes out. He promised not to lie again so i gave another chance. Then the next thing was that he didnt pay the bills and he didnt tell me. Then he asked for my money to pay his phone but the next day still a Warning letter came ...and he said that money was stolen from him and he couldnt pay it. Anyways these kinds of small lies here and there started bundling up. Then when i had the baby it seemed it was getting better and he stopped, whetever he was doing. When my baby reached 4 months then i found out he was using my phone nr for some weird txt messages and reached about 180euro limit. he said i shouldnt worry, that he is going to pay for it, but i didnt care i shouted and yelled and cried and told him he is a piece of xxxxxx! and the next day he just packed his bags, told me he wasnt ready to be a dad and that im too tense for him and he has over 1000 euro depts and he is going to leave me. I even mentioned it on Facebook. Anyways he was gone for about 5 months, but i didnt get over him (or maybe the habit of having him) and he started to flirt with me again and i decided to give him another chance.
We are not living together right now... and he said he is working on fixing his life and debts, but i dont see any progress so far. Sometimes we barely even talk. He is trying to be the "oh, how is our baby? send me some pictures!" or comes over, gives him kisses and hugs sometimes... but in reality, im still alone with him. I spend my everyday life alone... no matter if i passively "have him back".. we dont share our everyday difficulties.
So a little while back i started talking with this other guy.... and he seems rly interesting. And it seems he is interested in us too. That made me feel even worse.
My mother said that i shouldnt pass and block any good guy coming into my life because of my "ex"...
So now i feel i have to leave him ... because i feel im spitting on a very good guy just because im "waiting" for my "ex" to grow up.
It hurts from the inside because i know what i have to do.. or maybe im just confused. Why am i still with him?? Is it an old "habit"?? What should i do?
( i feel so lost and i dont want to hurt my "ex" but i dont want to be hurt myself. I dont know what to tell him.
He was my first and i havent dumped anyone before in my life and its heartbreaking
Sorry for the long sob story and i wonder if you even understand my problem, because i wrote it so fast :/ Anyways thanks for reading.
View Public Profile
Find all posts by MiaVena