May be pregnant, ultrasound TODAY and not sure how I feel about it
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January 23rd, 2014, 04:41 AM
Join Date: Dec 2013
So we got the ultrasound, and there in front of my was the image of a tiny, growing little person. We found out quickly that I was MUCH further along than we'd expected we could be - 15 weeks, due in July!! As soon as I saw the screen, this calmness flooded over me and I couldn't take my eyes off of it. Such an amazing moment. Needless to say, we're both so excited to be planning for our first child! We're not in a great financial situation right now, but it isn't forever.
For now, we're concerned about the reactions that we'll get from my side of the family. When we announced our engagement, we got a happy reaction from my grandmother after a stunned silence, and that was the very best reaction we got - far better in comparison to the rest. Mom still calls Jeramy my boyfriend... she won't acknowledge the reality of it, and we got very few congratulations from anyone in the family.
So I'm less than thrilled to be telling my family that we're expecting - when we announced the engagement, it was the end of the world. I am held to extraordinary standards by my family; I was to go to graduate school, work in some superior workforce, and earn a ton of money before I even think about marrying. That's just not me, and that's just not how my life has worked out, and they can't seem to put away their own images of what my life should look like and be proud of what they see before them! I am about to graduate from the University of Mount Union with a degree in Psychology, minors in Sociology and Gender Studies. I had planned to take a year off from school, as the last year has been a bundle of anxiety attacks and extreme stress and I just need a break! But I'd decided that no matter what happens an online degree for graduate school is the best place to start - I'm switching gears and planning on studying comparative religion and world cultures. We hadn't planned to have a child so early (if at all!), hell I hadn't planned to meet the love of my life and get engaged! But it happened, and I wouldn't change it one bit. This is OUR life together, and the beauty of it is that we really have no idea what's going to happen next. If my family could just let go of their plans and expectations for me and see how wonderful this life could be just taking it one step at a time... this stress would dissipate quickly.
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