At a crossroads
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February 4th, 2014, 09:56 PM
Join Date: Oct 2010
As other ladies on this board will point out, there is never a 'perfect' time to have children. Your life can change at any moment, and you never know what next month will bring. Here's a thought experiment: if three months from now you have your job back, get a raise, and have financial stability, will you regret having an abortion? We don't know what's coming next. We have to choose and go for it. You want to have children, you are currently pregnant with a child. Let go of the stress, the worry, and the fear over the uncertainly and let yourself get excited about this life inside you.
On the practical level, you have 8 months to prepare. That's more than enough time to find a new job if you won't be able to get back into your old one. There are lots of programs available to help you get back on your feet. Don't feel bad if you need to use some -- you've been paying taxes on your income to help people in hard situations. If it's your turn now that's exactly what it's there for.
Above all, please don't feel somehow selfish for wanting to mother this little child you are carrying. Becoming a mother is love and sacrifice, it's not selfishness. Loving and wanting your unborn child is not somehow taking advantage of him or her. Don't let anyone try to tell you that these deep feelings are somehow an indulgence of selfish thoughts. They are not.
When you say your other abortions were due to your partner's feeling it makes me feel like you were somehow emotionally pressured into them. I don't know if that's what you meant, but if so, you need to take control. You say you want to have children. Choose to have them. If your partner won't be supportive, find friends or family who can. You CAN do this, don't let anyone tell you that you can't. It doesn't mean it will all be easy and smooth sailing, but if it's what you want you will get through the rough parts and gain the sweet rewards.
I encourage you to join a due date board here on just mommies and you can get support and encouragement from other moms due the same month you are. Above all, best wishes, and please keep us posted!
Brooke, happy mama to one girl (9), and four boys (7, 5, 3, and 2) and a surprise post-vasectomy miracle baby born February 7.
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