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February 19th, 2007, 02:10 PM
*Bobbie*'s Avatar
*Bobbie* *Bobbie* is offline
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Rochester, NY
Posts: 15,851
Monday 2-19-07, 11w5d

Well we had an u/s this morning that confirmed my suspicion that the baby was no longer alive.

Today is Monday. Thursday night I could no longer find the hb on the doppler and I was spotting very faint. The u/s today revealed that the baby grew to 11 weeks. So I have a pretty accurate time for when my baby's soul left my body. Without the doppler I never would have known. I am greatful for that.

I went to the dr's Friday and they thought I was nuts. I told the nurse that I really felt something was wrong. They humored me and saw me that day. They had to wait until today to get me in for the u/s. I am glad in a way because it gave me a little time to prepare myself for what I might see.

What I saw was my baby laying face down in a ball at the bottom of the screen. It took me all of 5 seconds to see it wasn't moving. That was the hardest thing I have ever looked at. I asked the tech and she said it stopped growing a week after the last scan which was at 10 weeks. This kid was a fighter. She offered to let me have pics. I said no. I just couldn't do it. The baby looked so "sick" laying there like that.

This pregnancy has been sooo easy. I never once got sick. I was a little tired, but not bad.

Now I would give anything for constant m/s and a healthy baby. That isn't meant to be though.

I am tired and have a headache from crying. I just want nature to hurry up and let me get this over with. I want to see my sweet tiny baby.

I am just a mess right now. I can't eat. I hate having this baby bump with no living baby. That must be the cruelest (sp?) trick your body could ever play on you.

If I can't be pregnant I just want my normal life back. This really does suck.

__________________
Bobbie mom to : Jeremy (22) Amanda (19) Matthew ( 4) and Daniel (3).... RYAN DAVID 1/4/14 8lbs 10oz 20 3/4 inches!!! My miracle happened!
step-mom to: Stephany (23) and Krista (20)
step-grandma to: Wesley (3), Rosemarie (7 months)



On 1/31/12 at exactly 16 weeks pregnant Noah came too soon. He was our 7th loss
If you would like to see pictures of my sweet (but tiny) boy they can be viewed at www.caringbridge.org/visit/noahdarrohn they aren't the easiest pictures to look at but I am willing to share them with anyone who would like to see them <3
On August 2, 2012 we lost Sarah at 17 weeks. She was our 8th loss Her pictures can be viewed at http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/sarahdarrohn
There is no known explanation for my losses.

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