Update and random thoughts
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July 24th, 2007, 08:28 AM
So I am back in my house. Soon to be X moved out on Friday morning and the kids and I moved back in Friday night. The place was absolutely trashed. For someone who was always so absolutely anal about the kids keeping everything so spotless and clean....there were dishes piled in the sink, my bathroom was hideous. When they were moving stuff out of the house they had knocked shelves off the walls in the kids room and broken some of their stuff. I guess it shouldn't surprise me-their lack of respect for people's things. But at least I am back in my house now. The kids have their rooms back and now we have a month to get settled before school starts.
Ya know, it's amazing when you start dating someone who treats you really well and is nice to you and wants to do things for you and your kids, you look back and wonder how you could have let someone treat you so badly for so long. I guess it is a control thing, they get you under their control and they lower your self esteem and make you feel so worthless, like no one else would ever want you. But Russ, this guy I'm seeing now, is just so awesome. He cares so much about me and the kids and is so wonderful. I've known him since high school, we even dated back then. We lost touch over the years, but ran into each other about 4 years ago in Wal-Mart of all places. He happened to txt msg me the weekend I was leaving my husband after we hadn't talked in probably a year and all it said was "I was just checking on you to see if you are ok". Very bizarre. And we talked every day since then.
I filed for my divorce on Friday, so in 60 days it will be final, and I can basically just write off that marriage as a lesson learned.
I saw my pdoc yesterday and he put me on a different antidepressant, Luvox? He said it is very good for obsessive thoughts like purging. So we'll see. He was actually glad to see I hadn't LOST any more weight, so he didn't say anything at all about me needing to gain any more weight, because he knows that is a trigger for me. I won't take any meds that will make me gain weight, and I don't want anyone telling me to gain weight. I didn't lose any more, so at least he was happy with that.