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September 29th, 2005, 04:35 PM
Join Date: Sep 2005
Originally posted by JennL
@Sep 25 2005, 03:24 PM
Please, please don't feel guilty!! You shouldn't have to pour out your family history to anyone - and its perfectly acceptable and normal for you to say that this is your first child.* I feel like this is our first child -and i've m/c'd twice before.* The way that I see it is that this is going to be the 1st real time that my husband and I have experienced a pregnancy from start to finish.* Plus, it really depends on how you view your loss.* Of course I am still very sad about our losses, but they were both so early on in the pregnancy that I really didn't have enough time to truly bond with either of them before they were lost.* There was never a heartbeat with either of them - and honestly that helped for me to be able to deal with it easier, as I feel that without a heartbeat, there was never truly a life lost, although still really sad.
People will always have their own opinions of "what is right or proper", which usually is very antiquated and old-fashioned.* Personally, all that matters is what you and your fiance feel is right.* You shouldn't have to change your marriage plans - and you're certainly not the first person to get pregnant after getting engaged - happens all the time!*
Just please don't feel guilty - or let others make you feel guilty.* Enjoy your pregnancy! and congratulations on your upcoming marriage!!* You can share whatever you'd like with other people, but certainly don't feel like you have to tell everyone everything, only share what you're comfortable with.
Best of luck with everything!!*
I agree it all depends on how you view your lost. B/c I won't be able to say that my new pregnancy (whenever that happens) is my 1st child. We were at the halfway point with Khalil. We have pictures of my little boy and we have memorial cards from his burial and urns around our necks (me and my honey)
I agree with the part about her not feeling guilty...and enjoying her pregnancy. You be happy for your situation!!! Regardless to WHAT anyone thinks!
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