Topic: Introductions
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  #35  
January 6th, 2008, 11:35 PM
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tinkymom3 tinkymom3 is offline
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Quote:
Im Julia, my husband and I lost our son Joshua a year ago. He was stillborn at 21weeks. I still have a hard time sometimes, because everyone i know is either pregnant or has a new baby and I want #2 so badly. My husband doesnt really understand about how I feel and tells me I need to get over it...which i never will...he is my son, no matter if he is here or in heaven. I am glad to have this board and i look forward to getting to know you [/b]


Hello Julia and welcome to the board, I hope you find some comfort here sweetie as this is a long journey for us all indeed.... My name is Stephanie and I too lost a child, my first and only child at the time at 37 weeks. Noah was Stillborn causes unknown..... I have to say husband's do deal and cope with things way more different than we do, it's just how men were meant to be made I guess.... It hurts to hear him tell you to move on and get over it, that to me is a little harsh especially when it's his own child, so just turn to him and say " I will never get over it, I will get through it but get over it will never happen, he is my son and will always be remembered and thought of" Let him know that it hurts you deeply and if he is hurting to he may say this out of anger cause he doesn;t know how to show it, how to cope with his loss as well.... Sometimes men have to be the rock and so they keep things bottled away and when their child is brought up it hurts so bad they just say something rude so that the conversation stops, so that may be what he is doing.... Just try and be there for him and let him know it's ok to hurt too, that your child was a big part of him as well because some dads get pushed aside and forgotten that they too have gone through it, not just the mom's... I hope this helps

Quote:
Im Julia, my husband and I lost our son Joshua a year ago. He was stillborn at 21weeks. I still have a hard time sometimes, because everyone i know is either pregnant or has a new baby and I want #2 so badly. My husband doesnt really understand about how I feel and tells me I need to get over it...which i never will...he is my son, no matter if he is here or in heaven. I am glad to have this board and i look forward to getting to know you [/b]


Hello Julia and welcome to the board, I hope you find some comfort here sweetie as this is a long journey for us all indeed.... My name is Stephanie and I too lost a child, my first and only child at the time at 37 weeks. Noah was Stillborn causes unknown..... I have to say husband's do deal and cope with things way more different than we do, it's just how men were meant to be made I guess.... It hurts to hear him tell you to move on and get over it, that to me is a little harsh especially when it's his own child, so just turn to him and say " I will never get over it, I will get through it but get over it will never happen, he is my son and will always be remembered and thought of" Let him know that it hurts you deeply and if he is hurting to he may say this out of anger cause he doesn;t know how to show it, how to cope with his loss as well.... Sometimes men have to be the rock and so they keep things bottled away and when their child is brought up it hurts so bad they just say something rude so that the conversation stops, so that may be what he is doing.... Just try and be there for him and let him know it's ok to hurt too, that your child was a big part of him as well because some dads get pushed aside and forgotten that they too have gone through it, not just the mom's... I hope this helps
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