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-   -   Hello, I'm New To This Board (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f84-adoption/1592954-hello-im-new-to-board.html)

HMK June 10th, 2009 02:18 AM

Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
Ok so I am having an issue. My DH and I have been TTC for about 3 years. A few months ago I was told I probably have Graves Disease. I am going to get tested for it on the 24th. Which could explain the problems we have had concieving. Anyways, I have always wanted to adopt atleast one child. So DH and I have talked about adopting a child. So here is my issue. I know if we adopt, we will adopt from our state of Florida. So I have been looking at the children available on the dcf website. So I have completely fallen in love with an adorable 4 year old little boy. I feel a strong conection to him. SO I finally told DH about him. I suggested that maybe we could adopt before we actually have a bio child, if we can that is. DH said it wasn't a bad idea. But now I think he wants to wait and see if what happens at my doctor appoinment. Which is fine. But how do I tell him that I feel like this little boy should be ours? I have looked at many many children online, this sweet little boy is the only one who really calls out to me.

SarahBethsMommy June 10th, 2009 07:27 AM

Re: Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
Welcome to the board! I'm so sorry for all you've gone through for the last few years.

I'm a foster mom through the state of Alabama. I'm hoping to adopt through foster care too. I've looked at a LOT of those photolistings.

I don't want to be a downer at all, but I want to warn you. Many times on the listings the kids are actually already in an adoptive home or have tons of inquiries on them that are being checked already. This little child could possibly be your child to be, but please don't lose all hope if he isn't available when you can adopt.

Now, on to your real question. It seems our husbands are always a lot more hesitant that we are about adoption. My DH took 5 years before he would even consider adoption. I'd just tell him right out. This little boy has captured your heart. Let him know that adoption from the state takes a while. You have to take classes, fill out a load of paperwork, have homestudies, etc. before you are ever approved. That took us 7 months which apparently is a very quick time to get your liscense. Suggest to him that you start the process now. You can always stop the process no matter how far you are with no penalty.

I wish you the best in your search!!

BensMom June 10th, 2009 01:19 PM

Re: Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
I'm still working on my hubby. I've found several online that I wanted to snatch off the screen and keep forever, but in reality, that's not going to happen. If there's one out there for me, they're probably not even on a list yet. It'll be a few years.

WELCOME, by the way. :blush: I should've started with that. I really want 4 kids. I can't have any more biologically, but I've always wanted to adopt anyway. Dh has always wanted 2 kids. If we adopt in the future, I'd still like appx 3 years between our kids, and I'll want a 2-4 y/o, so it'll be a while.

Jessa78 June 10th, 2009 05:40 PM

Re: Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
:welcome: Heather.

Beth is absolutely right, on all counts. My DH and I were just approved in April and we began the process in October, although in our case we had to wait for the 6 weeks of classes to commence in March. In the meantime, we read as much as we could about adoption, befriended some great people who've BTDT and worked hard to make sure that all of our paperwork was done by the end of those six weeks. Since then we have inquired about several children who'd already been placed with adoptive families and simply hadn't been removed from the photo-listing yet. That being said, we are currently being considered for a placement that may be exactly what we've been hoping and praying for. So don't give up!
:smile:

Oh, and my DH took a lot longer to come around to the idea of adopting than I but once he made up his mind, he was all in and after years of infertility and loss, we have really enjoyed going through this process together. It's certainly had its ups and downs but it's brought us closer together, too.
:inlove:

I hope that you'll stick around and let us follow your journey. We're always here if you need us.

HMK June 12th, 2009 10:22 PM

Re: Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
Thank you so much ladies!! I wasn't sure if I'd get a reply or not. :) So I decided I'm gonna wait till I have go to my appointment with my Endo before I start really talking to him. Oh, and I understand that the little boy may not still be available, but I think the chances are pretty good, at least for now. I say that, only because the just posted a recent picture of him last week. But like I said, I'm just gonna wait until after my appoinment. I will be hanging out here though and Ill let everyone know what happens at the doctors and afterwards with DH. Thanks agai for your imputs!! :)

HMK June 13th, 2009 03:25 AM

Re: Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
Okay, so I looked at the little boy's photo Thursday night. Needless to say, I was looking up info on the website. While I was there, I decided to look at his sweet little face again, and well, his pictue has been taken down. So I guess he is no longer available. Which means I wont be talking to DH about him. Although i may still suggest that maybe we get the process started.

Jessa78 June 13th, 2009 09:21 AM

Re: Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
I'm sorry, hon. Good Luck - no matter what you decide. :dothug:

HMK June 13th, 2009 08:52 PM

Re: Hello, I'm New To This Board
 
Thanks Hun :)


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