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-   -   new here and needs lots of advice (http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f65-blended-families/190892-new-here-and-needs-lots-advice.html)

mom23 April 21st, 2006 08:28 PM

Hi everyone,
My name is Michelle and I have a three year old son a 13 year old step son and a 12 year old step daughter. I got along great with the kids until we got married. I still have a great realtionship with my sd but my step son is a whole nother story. :blink: I hope to get great advice from you all and maybe a new perspective in my thinking.

appifanie April 22nd, 2006 06:31 AM

uh oh . . . you're making me nervous. my df's son likes me a lot - i hope he'll still like me when df and i get married!

what does the sd call you? (i.e. mom, michelle, whatever)

ugh . . . teenagers! good luck . . .

mom23 April 22nd, 2006 07:42 AM

My step sone called me mama michelle until we got married then it went to michelle. since i had collin he won't even talk to me. :( My step daughter told us that since we had the collin thier mother told them they wouldn't be as important to us and and we wouldn't need them anymore :angry2: He trust his mother so there you have it. I really miss him and miss how close we use to be and wanted him to be a part of collin's life. I think how your step kids see you has so much to do with how the birth mother acts torwards you.

As for being nice about putting the insuarnce under my name i have never considered it that way. We are a family and that's what familys do. I just wish she would understand that.

I am sure many are thinking wow did she break up their marriage? The answer is no they had been apart for many years and she was remarried to someone else before i ever came along. She just doesn't want her kids to love anyone else as a mother figure. I am sure i would feel thta way to but i would have to suck it up and not hurt the kids because I have seen to many cases of the step parents hating the step children and wouldn't wish it on anyone. And heck who wouldnt love our kids right :wub:

Anyway i hope your situation turns out better than mine and the birth mother does not do this to you oor her son. It really ends up hurting everyone.

appifanie April 23rd, 2006 06:44 PM

Quote:

My step sone called me mama michelle until we got married then it went to michelle. since i had collin he won't even talk to me. :( My step daughter told us that since we had the collin thier mother told them they wouldn't be as important to us and and we wouldn't need them anymore :angry2: He trust his mother so there you have it. I really miss him and miss how close we use to be and wanted him to be a part of collin's life. I think how your step kids see you has so much to do with how the birth mother acts torwards you.[/b]
that's horrible. some ex's should just . . . be sent to a different planet. you could try telling collin that his mom is worried about him (i can't think of a good reason, but whatever) and that you want him to know that he is still very important to you. tell him that even though he might not believe it now, just to keep an open mind and he may eventually see that he's still important to you.

good luck!!

df's son's mom is wicked evil too - i put nothing past her


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