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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
July 30th, 2008, 09:05 PM
lowkey's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Jul 2008
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So I'm a 20 year old mother of one. I have a daughter who is one and half and I'm married to a good man. About a month back I was at a party with some friends, I got drunk beyond belief and slept with a friend. I've had an IUD for a year so I didn't worry about getting pregnant. I told my husband I cheated on him right away. We're working through that with some difficulty.

I knew something was 'wrong' right away. I'm the woman everyone knows that can spot a pregnant woman right away. I took a home test and it came up positive. My ultrasound lined the date of conception right on the night I cheated. Of course the woman said that I could still have conceived with my husband the day before or the day after.

I just don't believe it is my husband's since we've been having sex a lot using only the IUD and I haven't gotten pregnant. I think the guy I cheated with just had good sperm and hit me at the right time.

My husband knows I'm pregnant. He wants me to abort the baby. I didn't really want another baby but I don't like the idea of getting an abortion. The other possible father is out of state for a couple of weeks so I can't talk to him for a few more days but I plan on speaking to him as soon as he gets back.

I'm just so lost.
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  #2  
July 30th, 2008, 11:51 PM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Oh this is a difficult one and i am no one to judge the others for their doings, but lady your husband seems very supportive from what you describe and i cannot blame him for wanting an abortion. He knows that the baby is the other man's? I cannot even imagine to be in his position. Oh, poor man .... I cannot tell you what to do. It is up to you and how you can live with your decisions. I myslef couldn't fathom either cheating on my husband nor keeping a baby from another man while i was with him. But that is just me. Anyhow i wish you strength on whatever you decide because this is serious. And i wish your man patience....

Hope for the best for all of you.


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  #3  
July 30th, 2008, 11:57 PM
Minilegs's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm sure over time you will decide what's best for you and your marriage. Maybe he will supportive of you going through with the pregnancy and doing an adoption? As was said above, your husband is being very strong right now and that's pretty awesome! He may just support you in whatever you choose.
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  #4  
July 31st, 2008, 10:24 AM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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I would have to agree that your husband is being very supportive! I would sit down and talk with him about all the options avaiable. Including adoption. Good luck on whatever you deciede. Big hugs coming your way!
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  #5  
July 31st, 2008, 11:16 AM
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Quote:
So I'm a 20 year old mother of one. I have a daughter who is one and half and I'm married to a good man. About a month back I was at a party with some friends, I got drunk beyond belief and slept with a friend. I've had an IUD for a year so I didn't worry about getting pregnant. I told my husband I cheated on him right away. We're working through that with some difficulty.

I knew something was 'wrong' right away. I'm the woman everyone knows that can spot a pregnant woman right away. I took a home test and it came up positive. My ultrasound lined the date of conception right on the night I cheated. Of course the woman said that I could still have conceived with my husband the day before or the day after.

I just don't believe it is my husband's since we've been having sex a lot using only the IUD and I haven't gotten pregnant. I think the guy I cheated with just had good sperm and hit me at the right time.

My husband knows I'm pregnant. He wants me to abort the baby. I didn't really want another baby but I don't like the idea of getting an abortion. The other possible father is out of state for a couple of weeks so I can't talk to him for a few more days but I plan on speaking to him as soon as he gets back.

I'm just so lost.[/b]



My sister is going through something very similar to you. She and her husband have been having issues in their marraige for a while. She ended up getting pregnant by someone she thought was a good guy, turned out to be a low life. Her husband also wanted her to abort. She made the appointment, went to the clinic, and left knowing she couldn't go through with it. She is due in November, and while her home life is rough, she is happy to be having her son.
I think you have to follow your heart and do what is right for you. Not your husband, not the father of the baby, you. You will be the one to live with your decision, no matter what you decide. Good luck
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  #6  
August 1st, 2008, 01:13 PM
lowkey's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Jul 2008
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thanks for the replies. Yes my husband is being very supportive about this whole thing. Most men would never be this nice. I told my husband that I'm not really comfortable with getting an abortion. He is starting to warm up to the thought of me putting it up for adoption. He says that I have choices and that he is going to be with me through this whole thing.
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  #7  
August 1st, 2008, 07:11 PM
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Good luck with all you decide to do and you're lucky to have such an amazing husband. I'm sure you've both battled your own demons for your mistake but I'm sure you'll make the right decision for all concerned, including the baby.
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  #8  
August 4th, 2008, 01:01 PM
Jodi Dawn's Avatar Host of the Jan-July 05 P
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I would wait and get a DNA test done whenever you can so you can rule out who the father isnt. What if its your husbands baby and he wants you to abort the baby or put it up for adoption. Are you planning on having more children in the future?
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