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hey all. A BIG HUGE thanks to those of you that responded to my post UNEXPECTED. All of your words came through loud and clear and caring. It really helped me in staying calm, being true to myself, and coming to a final decision.
Last Wednesday I knew in my heart of hearts that I could not go through with an abortion. I just didnt know how I was going to make it on my own in my financial situation and so far away from my immediate support system. Or how I was going to face my BF and here him say he can't do it (which he already told me, but to hear it again!!). BF and I were supposed to get together last Thurs to have the final discussion and a blessing in disguise, we didn't.
I actually didn't see him again until today (monday). And I am so thoroughly thankful for the time that we had apart, that he had to think, ponder, whatever went through his mind. Because when I told him I couldn't possibly go through another abortion, that I felt we would be using it as a form of bc and that to me just felt wrong and that I had a slight attachement developed to keeping the baby...he was totally on board. I did tell him I didn't expect anything from him if he felt he couldn't/didn't want a child, but he just looked at me like I was INSANE and said of course I am going to be there. So we are having a baby? And I got this quirky grin from him.
I feel so much more at peace, I am still shocked and it is still hard for me to say outloud I am going to be a mom, I am going to have a baby. It's wierd. But the fact that he is there...someone I consider my destiny and it's coming true. I just pray that everything is healthy with the baby and that we can find the strength together to be the parents we need to be for this child.
Thank you all again for all the advice and encouragement. You all gave me a lot of strength and I am greatly appreciative. I look forward to sharing my journey and all of yours as the months progress!
Dyani - I am SO happy for you! I figured he would come around once he had time to think, I know that is how is was with my baby's father. You will be fine, things will work out financially. you seem prepared for the struggles that lie ahead, and that is important. But, I am happy that you see that having your baby will be worth all the sacrifices you will have to make! Congrats, please keep us up to date!
I am so happy for you! I was really praying that your BF would get on board with this and be there for you. Its a rough road ahead but use this 9 months without a baby to really solidify your relationship if this is who you really want to be with. I am hoping you keep us up to day on your progress and how things are going.