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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
November 13th, 2009, 09:14 AM
Newbie
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
Hi,

I am 19 years old and just found out I was pregnant Wednesday. The doctors confirmed it yesterday, and going to the gyno on Wednesday.

I am nervous. I have been dating my boyfriend who is 25, for almost 2 1/2 years now. We are in a great committed relationship......but i dont know how to deal with this.

Im not sure how far along I am.....

I am depressed, in shock.

We are not financially ready for baby. I am not sure he wants to keep it. Its not that I dont want to, but I dont know if I am ready for this. However, abortion seems just not for me.

Last edited by pinkbl; November 13th, 2009 at 09:19 AM.
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  #2  
November 13th, 2009, 09:35 AM
BigGrin's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,684
There is alway the option of placing the child for adoption.
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  #3  
November 13th, 2009, 09:41 AM
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
Yes, true. Although I dont think I could give my baby up for adoption.

I really think that, I need to step up and take responsibility. I do want the baby, and I think i just really want to make sure he wants it as well.

I want to find out how far along I am, and not tell anyone else yet. Because I think I may be around 5 weeks or so. Ive only told my sister.
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  #4  
November 13th, 2009, 10:12 AM
BigGrin's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 1,684
You can go to planned parenthood and they can do a dating ultrasound on you. They can also give prenatal care (prenatal vitamins and basic care) while providing counseling no matter your choice. I think you need to decide what is best for you no matter what you boyfriend thinks or "decides."
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  #5  
November 13th, 2009, 10:14 AM
Newbie
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
I have a prescription for prenatal vitamins, just need to go get it filled.

I am going to the gyno on Wed, so do I still need to go to planned parenthood?
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  #6  
November 13th, 2009, 11:43 AM
RavenRay's Avatar Regular
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Black Hills, South Dakota
Posts: 83
There are lots of good pregnancy resources available out there. Try a google search for your area and you should find a lot of good information and support. There are several state programs you may qualify for that could help out financially and emotionally. Definitely take advantage of those sources. They can help you decide what's best for you and your baby.
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  #7  
November 13th, 2009, 02:34 PM
mommy2Breana+Brandon's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: PA
Posts: 39,401
I would go with your gut feeling about the baby.

Hang in there you will make it work no matter what.

I don't think any of us was 'financial' ready for a kid.

Good Luck with everything.
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  #8  
November 13th, 2009, 02:41 PM
Newbie
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 7
Hi pinkbl,

You can do this! Its scary and overwhelming at the moment because the news is still new and hasn't sunk in yet, but it will and you'll be fine. Remember you've got 8 months to think and plan and get used to the idea of a baby.

Take care
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  #9  
November 14th, 2009, 09:16 AM
momtothe3rdpower's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,647
My advice is don't make the decision based on what he thinks. In our world, moms stick with the consequences much more than dads do. That said, I raised my oldest DD from an unplanned pg at the age of 17. She is now 13 years old and has a great life, although I know she wishes she were closer to her biological dad. If I would have based the decision on his desires that would have been short sighted because he was long gone by month 5. It sounds like your SO is more of a man, however, and I hope he supports you and the baby.
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  #10  
November 19th, 2009, 05:37 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Kazoo
Posts: 2,131
I know it's scary when you don't have much money, but somehow, when you make the right choices, everything ends up working out. DH and I got pg when he was 18 and I was 22 and we were so broke were were living in a studio apt and eating spaghetti almost every night. But just before the baby was born DH started getting more work and we were able to move into a bigger apt and we qualified for food stamps once the baby was born so that helped a ton. Also we got WIC which pays for most of the formula. We also just moved into a tax-credit townhouse so that has helped a lot too. Google WIC in your town and go in and see them. They will help you with some basic food and then I would go apply for welfare. You won't get much until the baby is born but each state is different so maybe you will. The pregnancy may be hard, but once you hold your baby you will realize it was all more than worth it Good luck
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  #11  
November 19th, 2009, 08:54 PM
Newbie
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
I went through the same thing. I was in shock and so scared the first couple weeks to the point I was having panic attacks... once we talked about it, figured out how we are going to make this work, I couldnt have been happier. I have been with my fiance only 9 months, hes in college and im not working. we were going to make it work... but to find out to days ago I miscarried at 9 months!
Things will work out in the end... just go with what ever you feel is the right thing to do & yes, search on google. There are tons of places out there you can go for support!
Lots Of Luck!!!
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