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Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #1  
April 11th, 2006, 06:58 AM
nat81
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You know I really didn't think I would since I was 23 when I got pregnant but when only 2 of my friends showed up at my baby shower, I realised I was wrong.

Now, there actually only one who I still talk to! Everyone else is still really into partying and couldn't care less about what has been going on in my life...

I have howerver become much closer to my older sister who had a baby 4 months before I did. I've gotten closer with my SIL (to be) as well!

What is or was your situation with friends?
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  #2  
April 11th, 2006, 08:15 AM
Lekilig86's Avatar Super Mommy
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Location: Charlotte, NC (until April 11th)
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Quote:
You know I really didn't think I would since I was 23 when I got pregnant but when only 2 of my friends showed up at my baby shower, I realised I was wrong.

Now, there actually only one who I still talk to! Everyone else is still really into partying and couldn't care less about what has been going on in my life...

I have howerver become much closer to my older sister who had a baby 4 months before I did. I've gotten closer with my SIL (to be) as well!

What is or was your situation with friends?[/b]
Yeah the only thing about it nowadays is people are having children later and later in life, and partying well into their mid 20's...which is a little disappointing to see. I haven't spoken to a lot of my friends since i quit doing all that stuff over a year ago honestly...So i didn't really have many "friends" to lose. No one is in my same boat i can relate to, just coming out of sophomore year of college pregnant is not something a lot of ppl are going through around here so i am pretty much a loner. It makes you stronger in the end, however.
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  #3  
April 11th, 2006, 08:22 AM
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Well I had my "partying phase" right when I got out of high school, so I was pretty much past that when we found out that I was pregnant. However, some of my other friends were just entering that phase and had already kind of drifted off prior to my pregnancy. I had 3 friends that weren't going through that phase that I was close to, and only one of them stopped talking to me after I found out that I was pregnant. These three friends I've known since I was in the 4th grade, so it hurt pretty badly that one of them would stop talking to me b/c of my pregnancy. But she's never had a boyfriend and never had any responsibilities, so I guess she doesn't really understand. I feel that she's the one missing out. My other two friends have been very involved (calling and asking how I'm doing and whatnot) and they are also two of my bridesmaids in my wedding in November!
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  #6  
April 11th, 2006, 09:05 AM
irishxrose
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I've lost a few... but I gained my best friend back from high school. She has a daughter and we're so close now because she understands my moods and everything else. My other friends could care less and are more into partying. It's showed me who my true friends are...
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  #7  
April 11th, 2006, 09:14 AM
nat81
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yea im down to 1 mommy friend, my sisters and my online girls... but, sadly this is just how it goes, and to be honest... it would happen the same way even if you were 35 and got PG, as long as they are still in their party years... because you arent doing their thing and they arent doing your thing.. i would suggest researching some good mommy/baby groups in your area, you can find some great friendship there...from women who are going through the things your going through...[/b]
Oh yeah I have! I was just asking this question to ask everyone
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  #8  
April 11th, 2006, 11:19 AM
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Funny enough, pregnancy has brought my friends and I closer. After our first year out of highschool, my group had pretty much drifted apart with the exception of one of them and myself as we've kept in touch and stayed close over the years. When we all found out that one of the girls from our "old group" was pregnant, we all got together and it was like this big reunion! Then when we found out she was having twins, well!!! It was like we had never lost touch. I think the main reason for that was because you really only truly find out who your real friends are when you need them. Her having twins was a huge thing, and we all knew she'd really need help, and friends that she could go to for anything. Then, when she was about 6 months preggers, I wound up pregnant, and now one of the other girls is trying with her fiance. So needless to say, we all kind of need eachother and have really stuck around to be there for support, and a good time! To tell you the truth, the only person in this world who has lost me as a "friend" because of my pregnancy has been my b/f's mom. She's the only who had a problem with it, and after everything that's happened, her and I won't ever be close. This isn't to say we would have EVER been, but there was at least a chance there.
Oh well, such is life, right?
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  #9  
April 11th, 2006, 12:58 PM
Mom2DyJessAva's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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my friends have been great and they all still keep in touch and there wonderful the one i did lose was my boyfriend
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  #10  
April 11th, 2006, 01:01 PM
mommytutu's Avatar mom to Emma & Jacqueline
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I haven't actually lost any friends, but since we have nothing in common anymore none of us actually hang out.

I have gained a lot of new friends though, ones with children, so I suppose it's an even trade. Plus DF and I have become a lot closer.
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  #11  
April 11th, 2006, 01:18 PM
JuneBug2006's Avatar Forever missing Gracie
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When I first got pregnant at 16, I was surprised at how my friends actually did stick around!
I think mostly it was the group of kids that I hung out with, we weren't in to the partying stage..........

Now that I am 25 and having my second child, I have already made friends with lots of moms throughout the years. I am involved at my son's school throughout the year and so basically they are my friend connection.

So no, I wouldn't say that I have lost any friends, but gained a whole much more too!
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  #12  
April 11th, 2006, 02:29 PM
Justmeandmyguys's Avatar Veteran
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I am just rekindling with my friends again. They did stop calling when I was preg, I guess because they did not want to be seen with a sick, fat pregnant girl. I was not really in the mood to go out when I was preg anyway.
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  #13  
April 11th, 2006, 08:12 PM
Telucero's Avatar Veteran
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I haven't really lost any friends, but a few have drifted. The few that have drifted have done so I think because they want friends they can go to the bar with. Honestly, I was pretty much over that when I got pregnant, so that isn't much of a loss. However, those that have drifted do still keep in touch. I will say I was surprised when a few have even become closer to me. It's been an interestiing time.
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  #14  
April 12th, 2006, 02:53 AM
lilbluedolphin's Avatar Super Mommy
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<span style="font-family:Arial">Yes I have lost a couple friends, and its change the friendships with the rest. Itís hard because all my friends are younger then me and even my best friend is still in the partying phase. She and I donít talk as much or see each other very often now because we are not into the same things anymore. I used to talk to her or see her every day, now I see her every two weeks or so. So I think me being pregnant has changed things and I think once the baby is here it will just change things more. So I am just signing up for the single mom support groups in the area. I am hoping to make friends that are moms. Its just hard to try and talk to someone about all your fears about being a parent etc. When they donít have kids. </span>
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