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Officially the biggest idiot in the entire world...hands down


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

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  #21  
February 28th, 2010, 12:43 PM
pattyandthemoos's Avatar Administrator
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Michigan
Posts: 61,642
Quote:
Originally Posted by three_beauties View Post
I feel really bad about my idiot comment. I hope it doesn't come across as me referring to unplanned pregnancies and the people that they happen to as idiots! I certainly don't think that. I was just mad at myself and typing. I hope no one took offense, and if so, I am very sorry!

Aprilmommytobe - I meant to type that I couldn't go give someone money at an abortion clinic. I just don't see how I can do it. As you said, it was just so traumatic and life changing. I just don't know.

I had to go to the ER last night b/c of a lot of bleeding. They thought it was ectopic (i've had one before) but they didn't see anything anywhere and my HCG levels were only 803. So I am not sure what's going on to be honest. I am a little nervous about it all. Certainly in some pain...but time will tell.
Do you mean they didn't see anything in the uterus? I have had two ectopic pregnancies so I can really understand why you are nervous. If you are in pain please make sure they are checking your hCG levels to make sure they are doubling like they should and follow up with your doctor for another ultrasound. Ectopics are not something to mess around with. I know they missed mine on ultrasound at first so make sure they follow up on you.

I also wanted to invite you over to the Ectopic Survivors group. Link is in my sig. I will send you an invite as well.
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  #22  
February 28th, 2010, 06:03 PM
ValyntineG's Avatar Based on a True Story
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Location: Texas and stuff
Posts: 6,414
I just started lurking here due to possibly the STUPIDEST unplanned pregnancy in the history of the planet. I didn't intend to post really, but I wanted to just say that I really understand how you feel.

Our situations could not be more different, but I think we are on exactly the same page about how we feel about everything.

At my last doctor's appointment I was put in a position where I actually had to tell him some of what happened and it was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. I just really really understand what you're going through.

No matter what you decide to do, know that no matter how stupid you feel it's really ok. Everyone makes mistakes sometimes and life can really smack you in the face occasionally... what matters is how you respond to the hand you are dealt. Stand up, brush yourself off and look the problem right in the face. Know that you can make the best out of this if you try and work at it. You sound like a strong woman. You can come out of this ok. Really.

I'm sorry that you're going through this and you're faced with such a difficult decision. Find whatever support you can and lean on that. I feel so lucky to have my girls in the Nov 08 PR that listen and support me 100% because I can't tell anyone else.

Big hugs honey. Chin up.
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  #23  
February 28th, 2010, 06:21 PM
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Seriously - I just want to cry. Never in my life have I seen more supportive people. I am just taken aback by it all. Thank you, thank you, thank you. THough I have my husband...I have kind of felt like I am going through this alone. That is until I found this board. Just amazing.

I think everyone has made such wonderful points. I asked my husband about adoption b/c I would much rather consider that than the alternative. He asked, could you really give birth to our son or daughter and then hand her over? My answer - no I couldn't. I feel complete and utter devastation for those who have not been able to conceive and then here I am. I know each and every life has their own struggle...those struggles make us who we are. We don't ask for them, they just come.

My first m/c I was absolutely shocked. I had not thought about it. Me, the hypochondriac had not thought about the fact that I could actually loose a baby once it was conceived. Then the ectopic, what a decision. Sure, let me sign these papers for you to go remove a perfectly healthy baby. Yes it will kill me, does it make it any easier - no. Then I m/c'd again. Like a bad record replaying over and over.

My first daughter was and is such a blessing. She's head strong and a spitting image of me. My second daughter is equally just as amazing. Considering she started life much too early at 28 weeks...she had to fight for every breath...and now she fights for every toy. My son, the first "oops". He was conceived 3.5 months after my second daughter was born. I found out 4 weeks after she was released from the NICU.

He was in the NICU for 17 days...far less than the 50 we spent for Emery. He was home for only 4 days and I was smacked in the face with his own mortality. He was life flighted, stopped breathing in the helicopter...intubated...almost died. Meningitis. ****.

He is now 7 months and beautiful.

I say all this b/c I am so blessed to have my children, no matter in what way they were conceived. However, with each child has come more 'harrowing' tales of the good fight...their struggles to stay in my body to grow...and their struggles to survive once they were born (not my first).

hang on lab work...
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  #24  
February 28th, 2010, 06:30 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 24
I don't know exactly what I am trying to say. I think I know the road I am going down but I am scared to death. I don't think I have it in me to have an abortion. But at the same time, I am scared to death of loosing a child b/c of my own physical deficits. In short, I am scared.

I am so scared of his family. Truth be told, I am a little scared of mine. His family is very judgmental...they do everything right, we do everything wrong (we cloth diaper and I make food...blah blah - they turn their nose up at me). I just don't know.

This may be all for not, I'll find out within the next week or so what exactly we have in there...a baby, a m/c, a baby in the wrong place. Not sure about anything. But I am sure that I thankful I found this board. Thank you ladies.
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  #25  
February 28th, 2010, 07:26 PM
pattyandthemoos's Avatar Administrator
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Michigan
Posts: 61,642
Quote:
Originally Posted by three_beauties View Post
I don't know exactly what I am trying to say. I think I know the road I am going down but I am scared to death. I don't think I have it in me to have an abortion. But at the same time, I am scared to death of loosing a child b/c of my own physical deficits. In short, I am scared.

I am so scared of his family. Truth be told, I am a little scared of mine. His family is very judgmental...they do everything right, we do everything wrong (we cloth diaper and I make food...blah blah - they turn their nose up at me). I just don't know.

This may be all for not, I'll find out within the next week or so what exactly we have in there...a baby, a m/c, a baby in the wrong place. Not sure about anything. But I am sure that I thankful I found this board. Thank you ladies.
I can really relate with this. We did not tell dh's mom about Lyndsey until I was 32 weeks pregnant for this very reason. Fortunately I don't show very early in my pregnancy and my inlaws live quite a distance from me. I think it is okay to not tell them for a while. If you wait until you are further along to tell people it may be easier. By then you and dh will have had time to sort through your own feelings and it will be easier to deal with what other people have to say.

And please stick around here. Sometimes the real world beats you up and you need some cyberhugs.
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  #26  
March 1st, 2010, 12:10 AM
Mom.to.PinknBlue's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Lame-o Illinois
Posts: 12,234

You are not an idiot, and things happen. And I completely understand why you are scared, and there is nothing wrong with that. Honeslty I would probably feel the same way you do if I was in your situation.
I will be thinking of you and praying for you and your family.
KUP sweetie and GL!
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  #27  
March 4th, 2010, 05:23 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 24
Well ladies, my instincts were dead on. I was treated today with my first round of methotrexate as this was an ectopic pregnancy. I am in some pretty bad pain and am worried the injection won't work. I've already told my doc that if it does not - she's doing surgery. I can't walk around like this.

Thank you all so much for your support in this crazy time. It has been wonderful to have some people to lean on. I will of course be checking in on all of you.

Good luck and stay strong girls.
Carey
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