Log In Sign Up

Need avdice please.


Forum: Unplanned Pregnancy

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Unplanned Pregnancy LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
December 16th, 2010, 04:35 PM
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 29
Hello all,
I am in a hard situation and need some advice and please no one judge or put me down. I'm doing that enough for myself. I found out I was pregnant and sat. I will be 7 weeks. Here is a little about what is going on: I already have 2 daughters, 8 yr old and 4 yr old girls. My husband and I separated over a year and half ago, we are going through a divorce now. Which is almost complete. I started talking to this guy and dated him for a while (only guy I have dated since ex) before we slept together and when we did we only had sex once with a condom. Plus I went to the dr. To get on birth control. Well shortly after that we broke up. Several weeks went by and I missed my period. That is where I am at right now. I'm beating myself up and feel horrible about myself. I have no idea how to deal with this, I know I don't want an abortion, but part of me feels like this is my only choice. I know this will be my moms choice. I do not know how to tell my mom. If anyone has any advice I would greatly appreciate it. I'm a full time student right now and have my A. A.
Thanks.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
December 16th, 2010, 06:15 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: southern cali
Posts: 3,259
bless your heart. its a tough spot to be in, i will grant you that. the best counsel i can offer is to say 'take your time to decide what your gonna do'. snap decisions tend to haunt you later. in this case, i might encourage you towards adoption - that sounds like what is best for the baby. your parents will probably take it hard, but they do tend to come around after the shock wears off. (i know -- i have been on both sides of this story at one time or another). best wishes.
__________________
what goes around, comes around.....
speak with kindness....

~~terre~~
Reply With Quote
  #3  
December 16th, 2010, 10:36 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ontario, Canada <3
Posts: 1,371
I think you need to take some time, and figure out what YOU want to do. Tell people later, after your decision has been made & don't let others influince your decsion.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #4  
December 16th, 2010, 11:19 PM
Newbie
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 6
Hi! I agree with what the others has told you. Take time and think about it. It's a really hard decision. If you are looking to do a private adoption we can help you. I was actually coming into the forums to figure out where to post. I was going to ask if there was any birthmothers here that have went to a support group and know of anyone wanting to place for adoption? My husband and I have been trying for awhile now and we have not had any luck. We can't conceive either. We have had some bad tragedies. However, I wish you the best luck in your decision! May God Bless you always.. Please take care of yourself. If you ever need a friend, please reply. HUGS TO YOU!!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
December 17th, 2010, 03:04 AM
DramaFreeMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: The Burgh, PA
Posts: 1,623
Hi there and welcome You don't have to worry about the ladies judging you here or putting you down. This is a very supportive group of women who have been in the same or similar situations. There is no better place to get advice

I agree with what the others said about taking your time. Really think through your decision and don't let other people influence your choice. It is really a tough situation and only you will know what's the best thing to do for you and your family.

If you don't want an abortion and you decide it's not the best decision to keep the baby, adoption is always an option as well. Just make sure you choose an option that you are comfortable with.

Good luck and i'm wishing you the best, whatever choice you choose to make.
__________________

Cece


Thank You Sharon for my beautiful siggy!



Reply With Quote
  #6  
December 17th, 2010, 06:10 AM
beckii's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: NS Canada
Posts: 11,388
Send a message via MSN to beckii Send a message via Yahoo to beckii
Hi & welcome First off, to you!

I agree with what the other ladies have said - take your time & make sure that whatever decision you make is YOURS. Because in the end, you're the only one that has to live with it. There is nothing wrong with abortion or adoption - if you feel that one of those is the best choice for yourself & your baby, then please do NOT let anyone influence you another way.

GL & feel free to post anytime about anything that is bothering you
__________________
beckii ... momma to my beautiful princess Mikayla Lynn 01.18.06
Reply With Quote
  #7  
December 17th, 2010, 03:58 PM
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 29
Thank you all for the advice and responses. I'm really leaning towarda keeping the baby. First I don't believe in abortion for myself. I'm also a very good mother and couldn't imagine anyone else raising my child. I'm happy people can do it. Now I just hand to find a way to tell my mom. Any ideas? I'm thinking of not telling her until about 3 or 4 months preg. So she can't suggest an abortion.
Thank you again for the support and welcomes.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
December 18th, 2010, 08:55 AM
DramaFreeMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: The Burgh, PA
Posts: 1,623
Quote:
Originally Posted by kandlmommy View Post
Thank you all for the advice and responses. I'm really leaning towarda keeping the baby. First I don't believe in abortion for myself. I'm also a very good mother and couldn't imagine anyone else raising my child. I'm happy people can do it. Now I just hand to find a way to tell my mom. Any ideas? I'm thinking of not telling her until about 3 or 4 months preg. So she can't suggest an abortion.
Thank you again for the support and welcomes.
I don't know what your relationship with your mom is like but i know i waited 4 months to tell my mom...and she still suggested abortion. Me and my mom have a very strained relationship though.

I waited till i was 12 weeks before i told anyone in my family. I wanted to pass my first trimester and make sure the baby was healthy and fine. SO's family (and all his friends thanks to his big mouth) knew almost right away but he is older so they were much more excited for him than my family was for me at first.

I say, if you can and want to keep it a secret for a while, that's perfectly fine. You should tell your mom when you are most comfortable. Just don't wait too long (like a month or 2 before) because then they might feel a little hurt you kept it from them for so long.

Have you told the baby's father yet? Does he plan on being supportive at all?
__________________

Cece


Thank You Sharon for my beautiful siggy!



Reply With Quote
  #9  
December 18th, 2010, 01:52 PM
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 29
I'm really close to my mom. She does get mad easily though. I have to tell her soon because I am her neighbor. I am hoping to stay sick free and not much weight gain. I would like to wait until it's to late for an abortion.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
December 29th, 2010, 08:14 AM
Claysgirl's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 823
The other ladies have given you some great advice. Please feel free to come join us on the Birth Mother's Board if adoption is something you would like more information on, or are considering. All of us Birth Moms have faced unplanned pregnancies and know what it's like to feel confused about what to do.

Best of luck.
__________________
Katie
Momma to Matthew 4-15-09
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:40 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0